Showing posts with label Because I'm Weird Like That. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Because I'm Weird Like That. Show all posts

Saturday, February 19, 2011

The Cookies Are Trying to Kill Me

Yes, it's true. While most of you may not automatically associate Girl Scout cookies with "pure evil", I certainly do. Maybe it's because I see so many of them compared to most of you. CCW will feel my pain, having been a troop cookie manager in the past, but most of you get happy smiles on your faces when you know it's cookie time. Not me.

More evidence that the cookies are indeed trying to kill me -- the strained back that I got on pickup day. I apparently compressed the sacroiliac joint in the pelvis, and boy howdy, does it HURT! I have pain killers and muscle relaxers from the doc, but they are barely denting the pain.

So, you guys enjoy the cookies. I'm going to stay over here, out of the way.

Monday, November 30, 2009

Too Epic For Words



Love it! Must have it on repeat, all the time!

JF found this for me, and siad it was eminently bloggable, and so it is!

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

RBoC

Random Bullets of Crap:

-- Tomorrow is midterm. How the hell is it midterm already?!? I'm not really cramming this quarter because I feel a lot more sure with the subject matter. So far, my GPA is a 90.87, which I'm pretty happy with. I am wondering what tomorrow's midterm will hold, but since we take our exams through Blackboard, I will be able to see my score as soon as I submit the exam. So, I'll either be happy tomorrow evening, or totally bummed.

-- School (the other school -- the one I get paid to go to...) is going pretty well. Or, well -- I should say it's going well in MY case, though how others around me are feeling, I have no idea. The last two years have taught me that I no longer have the capacity to judge what "they" might be feeling one way or the other. That, and maybe sometimes change is not only good, but necessary.

-- Thursday is my birthday, and Offspring is taking macabre delight in torturing me with the fact that I'm a year away from forty. I now regret doing the same thing to my own parents. I see now how annoying that truly is. And, I feel creakier with every passing day.

-- Tonight I have a meeting that has all the hallmarks of DOOM! about it. I'm hoping that all the players involved in this mess can find some common ground and that it won't suck majorly. May the fates be kind to us all.....

-- I talked to my mother this afternoon, and my aunt who has brain cancer is doing well. She's scheduled to take part in a clinical trial starting soon, and then chemo and/or radiation by the end of the year. She's doing amazingly well, and I am so glad to have her not only still with us, but almost as good as new. I got an email from her a few days ago, and was so pleased that she was not only out of the hospital but also emailing and sounding like her normal self. Modern medicine is miraculous, and I am so thankful for that.

-- Offspring's been sick, and now JF's been sidelined, too. It's most likely not swine flu, Thank God. Stuffy noses, headaches, and slight temperatures. Just your normal ickiness of the season.

Not much else to report, so I'm off to make dinner and sit with my family for a bit before I have to head out for this meeting. Everyone have a good week!

Friday, August 07, 2009

Paging Dr. Freud

Some of you might already know that I'm preparing for some oral surgery on Monday. Nothing too extreme, but I have an impacted wisdom tooth that's got to come out, and I wanted to get it done and over with before I had to report back to school. It wouldn't be good to start off the year with a requesting a couple of sick days.

I'm a little freaked out about surgery, but this will be the second time I've had this procedure, so it's not quite so scary. I remember thinking last time, just before the drugs kicked in..."I *really* don't want to do this!" But, in no time at all, it was over and I had cheeks that looked like a bad Marlon Brando "Godfather" impersonator. But, then again, I remember thinking the exact same thought as Offspring's head was crowning during birth. "I REALLY don't want to do this!!!" Funny how passing a bowling ball-sized object through a drinking straw-sized portion of your anatomy can play havoc with your emotions.

But, with the worry of impending surgery, I've been having a sort-of recurring dream that I've had for many years: the losing of the teeth. Now, when I say "losing of the teeth", I mean not just losing a tooth here and there, but very VIVID dreams of doing normal activity and suddenly every single tooth in my head falls out. Fine one minute, and the next: poof! Toothless crone.

The details differ from dream to dream, but the ultimate outcome is that I end up with no teeth in one fell swoop. In one dream, I remember getting up like normal, and heading to the bathroom to brush my teeth, and having the toothbrush knock out a tooth or two, and the rest following like dominoes. So, there I am, with toothpaste dripping down my chin and a heap of what look like white Chiclets filling up my palm.

Other variations involve me thinking a tooth is loose, and going to push on it with a finger, and having that tooth and all the rest fall out into the sink. Or, the one where I bite into a crisp apple, and draw back, only to find all the teeth are stuck in said apple. Or the one where I'm just suddenly able to spit teeth into my palm like you'd spit out watermelon seeds.

Crazy, right? Back away slowly, people.

I know Freudian Dream Analysis would say that I'm vain and worried about the loss of my beauty, but since I feel like you can't really lose what you never had, that's not so much of an option. (And, yes -- I DO have self-esteem issues, but this isn't so much a dig at myself as it is a sad fact. It's not like I was going to be on the cover of any magazines any time soon. Anyway...)

I even talked to a guy who had a "dream analysis" blog. Apparently, it's a pretty common dream, and it could also relate to your sense of confidence, and how others see you. I mean, a nice smile (or a not-so-nice one) is something most people notice right off the bat. So, if you lose all your teeth, you might be embarrassed to face people, and your confidence would take a hit. Or, it may convey a sense of powerlessness -- you may feel that things are out of your control, or that your voice isn't being heard.

Whatever the root cause is, come Monday, I will be one tooth less. Maybe I should talk to the dentist now about a set of dentures -- sort of a preemptive strike. Best to be prepared, just in case.

Friday, July 17, 2009

Migraines Suck!

As if many of you didn't know already, I am here to inform you of the vast suckitutde of migraine headaches. Never say I'm not informative.

I've been on migraine medication for about two months now; stuff that was SUPPOSED to not only lessen the severity of my migraines, but also to lessen the frequency of said migraines. I am here to formally call bullshit on the severity aspect. Any time you can vomit on yourself and not really give a damn because your brain is threatening to explode, I don't think you can chalk that one in the "less severe" column.

Also, this medication was supposed to free me from the cares and worries of migraine headaches, and it hasn't done that, either. Damn those lying advertising people! I would say "heads will roll!" at this point, but I think my own head did enough of that last night, and I really don't wish it on anyone else. Even to the people I dislike intensely.

Saturday, June 20, 2009

What In Hell Made Me Think I Could Do This?!?!

School (college) starts on Monday. I have spent the latter part of this week getting ready for the start of Summer Term. School (elementary school) ended on Wednesday, and since then, I have had to focus away from my full-time job, and onto my soon-to-be-starting school (college.)

Yesterday, I had to go downtown to the main administrative building to get my student ID, even though I will be taking an online class. The reason that I went ahead and got the student ID was so that I could get into various buildings, should I need them, like the library, and the student center. I also took my husband to lunch, and then we went to pick up my textbooks and some of the supplies. My God, I had forgotten how freaking expensive college is! Thank God I had some of the necessary supplies here at home, or I'd be in deep doo-doo.

This morning, I finished up my online orientation, and the requisite assignments that that entailed, and printed out the 10-week syllabus. I looked over the first lesson, and went ahead and read the first 3 chapters in the textbook. My overwhelming thought now, is "what in hell have you gotten yourself into? Don't you know you're pushing 40? It's not like you're a coed who can cram all night and still function like a living human being during class during the day!" A good bet for your entertainment for the next 10 weeks would be to stay tuned and watch me self-flagellate daily. That, or spontaneously combust. Oy.

Monday, March 09, 2009

Burnt Out

....or rather, the fire in my throat has burnt out. I, myself, have been feeling burnt out for a while. The latest development in the illness saga is that while my throat no longer feels as if it lost a fight with a packet of razor blades followed by a lemon juice chaser, it had mysteriously gone on strike.

I woke up this morning tired (thanks, Daylight Savings Time!) but feeling much better overall. There was some minor hacking in the shower as the hot water loosened my chest up, but my first clue that Something Was Not Right was in the car on the way to work. I've been blasting the most recent Evanescence album for about a month now, and trilling along with Amy Lee. Imagine my surprise when my usual soprano voice did a fairly convincing "Alvin and the Chipmunks" impersonation.

It was decidedly off to realize that I was about to head into a classroom with 16 rambunctious charges with no voice to speak of. I relied a lot on pseudo-sign language today, coupled with a lot of "come close so I can whisper to you" gestures. There was a lot of pointing, and a lot of raised eyebrows as well. I'll let you all imagine how swimmingly my day went. Go ahead -- imagine. I'll wait. Okay. Got a picture in your head? Now, instead superimpose that image with one of the mushroom clouds after the nuclear tests on Bikini Atoll, and you're just about there.

To cap the night off, Offspring gets a frantic text message from a school friend that the super duper, miss-the-WHOLE-day-of-school field trip she's been DYING to go on only has about 13 slots left. She panics, and thrusts the phone at me to call the travel agent in order to secure one of those last seats. Of course, they are closed for the day. OF COURSE. My life wouldn't have it any other way. I leave a very squeaky voice mail for the agent, and hope like hell they can decipher it.

And, in keeping with the "Once again, the Devil farts in my face" tradition, the very minute I am off the phone, Offspring bursts into the room, saying that the message that she got from her friend was "just a joke." Well, of course it was! AND I get to pony up $116 for the privilege, too!

Granted, the trip is an educational one, and one that I'd like to go on, if given the chance. (They're going to see the King Tut exhibit and the Terracotta Army in Atlanta.) I can't go however, because of this pesky thing called work, and because we will be leaving not even 24 hours later on a Girl Scout trip to go snow-skiing. Don't worry, I'm not taking the ankle biters -- this trip is Offspring's troop. We'll be driving to West Virginia, so I will need plenty of rest beforehand. Which means no back-to-back trips for good old Mom. Poor old Dad won't be going on EITHER trip. He'd have to bunk with a bunch of Boy Scouts he doesn't know for the skiing trip, and he's not exactly what one would call a social animal.

So, I'm off to bed in hopes that my voice will return as mysteriously as it left. If not, I have another day of pointing and gesturing ahead. What fun!

Sunday, February 08, 2009

Life in the Fast Lane

My time has been booked pretty solid for about two to three weeks now. I have had a lot to do since starting this Girl Scout troop. There is a lot of planning that goes into those meetings, and most parents never see all that. Plus, there's been the continuing craft workshops that I'm trying to offer, and family stuff as well.

I did manage to jaunt off to a crafting meeting on Saturday, and spent the afternoon with 16 other ladies, learning all about the new products that our company is offering, and getting to make some great projects with said new, pretty stuff. If you'd like, I'll post some pictures.

Offspring spent most of today making a "Wanted" poster for a school project. May I say that I was very happy to be able to slightly seduce her to the Crafty Side with distressing tools, parchment paper, and a judiciously sponged application of brown ink to "age" her poster. There may be hope yet for her eventual assimilation!

JF got a begging "please come back to us!" plea from the makers of "Star Wars Galaxies", so he's been playing that all weekend. The verdict is not good, folks. He says he won't re-up past the 2 week free trial.

Offspring and I are gearing up for Girl Scout cookie time. It's right around the corner, much to my dismay. I enjoy the fact that we get to do a lot with the money that comes from selling cookies, but it's such a time-suck for about six weeks. Ah, well. We're planning trips to West Virginia for some snow-skiing in early April (most of our girls have never been skiing) and then a trip to Sea World in May, and an overnighter at Kennedy Space Center in June. Plus, all the while, we'll be saving for London next summer. So, we'd better sell a bucketload of cookies.

What's new with all of you?

Monday, February 02, 2009

A Fabulous Deal Comes Back To Bite Me In The Butt

The other day, I decided to shop online for some things I needed for Girl Scouts. (Have I mentioned here that I was asked to start up a troop at my school? If not, I'll provide details at the end...)

I went to the official online shop and found the few things I needed, plus some great deals on uniform pieces for Offspring. I got really excited when I saw that some of her age-level items were on clearance -- two different styles of pants, one priced at 99 cents, and the other at $1.49. They also had a uniform shirt for 99 cents. I got all happy, and started clicking away. I am always glad to find stuff like this on sale. So, I had my sale items, and one really expensive item. My total is close to $100.

Imagine my dismay when I get all of the shopping done, and am at the end of the transaction, with all of the credit card information entered in, and BAM -- I get an error message. I get "We are unable to complete your request at this time. Please try again later." I got a little ticked, but I just figured that their system was down. I thought I'd try again later, since most of that was a really good deal.

I try again later, but still get the SAME blasted message. Over the next two days, I try this same transaction several more times -- all are unsuccessful, much to my dismay. I end up having to call Customer Service in order to get what I want to go through.

Fast forward to this past Friday evening. JF, Offspring, and I are all relaxing at home, when there is a knock on our front door. The only time someone knocks on our door at that time of the evening, it's usually our friendly UPS man to deliver a package. JF opens the door, and comes back into our bedroom carrying 5 packages. Count them -- FIVE -- packages. I immediately get a sinking feeling.

Lo and behold, through the magic of the Internet, apparently ALL the times I placed that order, it went through. Never mind that I never got a confirmation on any of those attempted purchases, only an error. I now have FIVE pairs of pants, FIVE shirts, and four $75 silk scarves. Ouch!

Of course, the delivery arrives after the Customer Service office is closed for the weekend, and I rush around, all in a tizzy, trying to make sure that I only used a credit card, and not my debit card, or we're in a serious mess. JF is usually the worrier in the family, but I'm worked up -- this is more than $400 we're talking about; money we can't just throw away at this point. JF calms me down, and tells me to check the bank account online. We do, and it seems we're safe as far as these transactions go. They were all made with one credit card, and we can get that taken care of pretty easily.

So, this morning, I call the Customer Support line, and explain to the representative about what has obviously happened. She seems pretty shocked that their internal auditing system didn't catch this snafu, but tells me to box all the unwanted items up and send them back, and the will give me a full refund.

All I know is it's probably going to cost me a freaking mint to mail all this stuff back, and I certainly won't be buying anything online from them for a LONG time.

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* Okay, so I was asked way back in November if I would be interested in starting up a troop at my school for kindergarten and first grade girls. I told the Powers That Be that I would think about it, and after some deliberation, I decided to do it. My main reason for agreeing is that I recruited a good friend to serve as my assistant. Leading a troop is a lot of work, and I've had lackluster backup and dismal parent participation before. I decided that if I did this, I was going to need someone that I could count on to ACTUALLY help. My friend, whom I call "Small, But Sassy" was a person that I knew wouldn't let me down. What with holidays, school stuff, and the snail's pace at which the bureaucracy works, we didn't get our ducks in a row until this past week. So, that's the scoop. I'll keep you all posted. Cross your fingers for me.

Saturday, January 24, 2009

The Bucket List

I got an email from a school friend not long ago, and in it was her "bucket list." I thought it might make good blog fodder, so I'm passing it along to you. Here are the rules:


Copy and Paste to new email and place an X by all the things you've done and remove the X from the ones you have not, and send it to your friends (including me). (Or, in this case, steal it for your own blog...)

This is for your entire life!


(X
) Gone on a blind date
( ) Skipped school.
(X) Watched someone die
( ) Been to Canada
( ) Been to Mexico
(X) Been to Florida
(X) Been on a plane
(X) Been lost
( ) Been on the opposite side of the country
(X) Gone to Washington, DC
(X) Peed in the ocean
(X) Cried yourself to sleep
(X) Played cops and robbers
(X) Recently colored with crayons
(X) Sang karaoke
(X) Paid for a meal with only coins
(X) Done something you told yourself you wouldn't?
(X) Made prank phone calls
(X) Laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose & elsewhere.
(X) Caught a snowflake on your tongue
(X) Danced in the rain
(X) Written a letter to Santa Claus
(X) Been kissed under the mistletoe
(X) Watched the sunrise with someone
(X) Blown bubbles
(X) Gone ice-skating
(X) Been skinny dipping outdoors
( ) Gone to the movies alone.

1. Any nickname? the shortened version of my real name. JF also calls me "Boo."

2. Mother's name? Lynn

3. Favorite drink? Cherry Limeade

4. Favorite car? Honda Element

5. How much do you love your job? A lot

6. Birthplace? CityOfMyBirth

7. Favorite vacation spot? Places that I've *actually* been: Germany; places I WANT to go: London.

8. Ever been to Africa? No

9. Ever eaten just cookies for dinner? No, but I HAVE eaten just pie.

10. Ever been on TV? Yes

11. EVER steal any traffic signs? Yes

12. Ever been in a car accident? Yes

13. Drive a 2-door or 4-door vehicle? 4-Door

14. Can you drive a standard (Manual shift)car? Yes

15. Favorite pie? Chocolate Silk

16. Favorite number? 12

17. Favorite movie? "Twilight" is the most recent one I've seen, but one of my all-time faves is "Better Off Dead."

18. Favorite holiday? Christmas

19. Favorite dessert? Chocolate, in all its forms...

20. Favorite food? fried chicken

21. Favorite day of the week? Saturday

22. Favorite brand of body soap? Ivory "Pure Clean" Body Wash

23. Favorite toothpaste? Colgate Total with mouthwash beads.

24. Favorite smell? roses and rose perfume, especially Victorian and Tea Roses

25. How do you relax? Craft, read a book, take naps.

26. How do you see yourself in 10 years? Hopefully, I will be happy and healthy.

27. Furthest place you will send this message to? Maybe Jeni in Scotland will reply!

28. Who will respond to this the fastest? Hm - maybe Marni?

Sunday, January 18, 2009

Bingo!

Not long ago, JF came home with a "WalMart Bingo" card that he found online. We laughed about it, because a trip to El Diablo WalMarto usually involves about every slice of the demographic pie out there. Some of the categories on his card (the one linked above) were:

-- child without shoes
-- a visibly pregnant woman with a "tramp stamp" tattoo
-- frozen food item left to thaw in a random aisle
-- someone oblivious to the fact that they are in your way

Today, we ran into a few categories that weren't even ON the card, and one that we often wish would happen, but never seems to.

I did see a child with no shoes, but to be fair, it was a baby in a stroller, and most likely wouldn't have been wearing shoes anyway. The baby DID have on socks, at least.

There was a woman in slippers, but no hair curlers. She must have gotten a rude awakening when she left the store to find out that the heavens had opened and we were now about ankle deep in water.

There are *always* people who block an entire aisle while they try to decide: "BBQ chips, or Ranch?", and today was no exception. I think most of them know damn well that they're gumming up the flow of traffic, and they just don't care. Anything that puts the other guy out is a Good Thing in their eyes.

There was the kid trifecta -- one throwing a tantrum because Mama wouldn't buy her something; the trio of kids riding the cart by hanging off whatever space was available; and the siblings having a fight. JF espied one little girl pulling another (possibly her little sister) across the floor by her ankles.

There was the local-to-our-area freebie middle square -- the wildly dressed/wild hair art college student wandering around, complete with vacant stare and iPod turned up WAY too loud.

The one category that we sometimes long to see (but not nearly often enough) are the kids who TOTALLY DESERVE IT getting their butts whipped. We often see the mamas who will smack their beloved progeny for no reason -- Mama whaps Junior upside the head and says, "No, I TOLE you we wasn't gettin' no Pop Tarts today!" -- but I mean the really obnoxious kid who tells his parent to "shut up, stupid!" and who richly deserves a beating that never seems to come.

We hate going to WalMart, but it's a necessary evil. At least playing Bingo keeps us occupied.

Wednesday, December 31, 2008

It Ain't A True Southern New Year's Eve 'Til Someone's Blown A Hand Off

Yet another New Year's Eve in the Nation's Groin, and already the fireworks are loud and numerous.

We got back early this evening from a quick commando blitz-style trip to CityOfMyBirth for what I sincerely pray is the last little bit of festive family togetherness until at least Spring Break. We spent some time with my grandmother, who will be 90 this year, and God Bless her, she spent about 20 minutes of the time we were there whacking my father for one thing or another. May I say that I absolutely *adore* the fact that my father was getting called on the carpet and smacked like a naughty toddler by his mother?! It was truly a Christmas Miracle. I will hold the vision of my grandmother and my father elbows-deep into a bitch slap fight in my mind's eye until my dying day. It means I have ammunition against my father, and that, dear readers, is more precious than gold.

The next time he tries to verbally spar with me, I shall remind him that I saw his 90 year old mother kick his ass, and I shall win. Period. Enough said. My reign shall be awesome to behold!

Ahem. Sorry. Got a little sidetracked there. Seriously though -- if you lived with my father, you would totally appreicate the need to have ammunition like this ready against him. I have been at his mercy for far too long.

The trip was otherwish uneventful, other than the Ben and Jerry's scoop shop in CityOfMyBirth has closed, and that bummed Offspring out to no end. Our local scoop shop has been closed for about four years, so we always capped off a family trip with an ice cream, and it peeved Offspring that she was denied Ben and Jerry's. We had to settle for Marble Slab Creamery, and it wasn't nearly as good.

The trip home was scary -- the major highway was populated by idiots who were determined to run us off the road, and after we bumped through the median grass after a game of chicken with an SUV and a semi, we said the hell with it, and took a two-lane road in towards town. Then, some total knucle-dragger decided to pass a slower driver by coming at us head-on. We did another fancy slide through the soft shoulder, and crammed our hearts back in our chests. Luckily, after that, we passed over the river, into our state, and our town. We headed through the downtown area, to see cop cars with people pulled over virtually EVERYWHERE! Nothing says "welcome home!" like a squad car's light bar.

We stopped on the way to the house to grab fast food because I think our luck had run out. We're staying in tonight, and hoping that's fireworks we hear, and not gunshots.

Happy New Year, everyone! May 2009 be a helluva lot better than 2008!

Friday, December 19, 2008

Break Out The Peppermint Schnapps-- School's Over!

In honor of the momentous occasion of two paid weeks off from work *and* no rambunctious little charges to herd like a farmer, I give you a Christmas-themed meme.

I don't remember were I got this from. Either I stole it from one of the people I read, or I stole it from one of the people THEY read. Or, maybe I got it as a mass-email and decided it would be good blog fodder. In any case, here you go!

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1. Wrapping paper or gift bags?

I actually LIKE wrapping presents. However, there are always those oddly-shaped items that you have to resort to a bag for. I typically do NOT use bags for Juggling Freak and Offspring simply because they are peekers. I thought that Hallmark’s motion-activated gift bags this year would be a great solution for the Incredibly Sneaky-Peeky Duo, but the cat would most likely set it off at 3 in the morning, and I’d have to kill her.


2. Real tree or artificial?

Real trees are best, especially for the scent, but they’re so messy. We got an artificial when Offspring was small, and we’ve used an artificial ever since.


3. When do you put up the tree?

Juggling Freak is a total Scrooge who refuses to do one single iota of Christmas decorating until it is actually December. Usually, we do the tree on the first weekend of December.


4. When do you take the tree down?

As soon as I can fully admit to myself that the holiday is once again over. (sigh.)

5. Do you like egg nog?

Blargh! No. I’ll repeat my answer from last year’s meme – drinking eggnog is like saying you want to get a little drunk, but you also want some pancakes.


6. Favorite gift received as a child?

I have a few that I remember quite fondly. I had a plastic cow that drank water and you could then milk a very watery, white “milk” from her plastic udders. It was probably made in China and highly toxic, but it was the 70s, and no one thought about stuff like that then.


7. Hardest person to buy for?

My parents. My mother has absolutely EVERYTHING, and my father gets harder to buy for each year.


8. Easiest person to buy for?

Offspring. I am usually pretty well versed on what is or is not to her taste. Though, as she gets older, she gets harder to buy for. It’s not all toys and dolls anymore.


9. Do you have a nativity scene?

No. The one I used to have was made out of glass, and the blasted cat shattered some of the pieces years back. However, we do have several Playmobil advent calendars, which are lots of fun.

10. Have you ever recycled a Christmas gift?

Yes. Usually stuff that I get from students, because really – how many lotions from Bath and Body Works does one REALLY need?


11. Lights on a Christmas Tree?

Hells, yeah! The more the better, in my opinion! Juggling Freak says that I like so many lights on the tree that you can get a tan by sitting by it.


12. When do you start shopping?

I sort of look around all year long, and will very occasionally pick up the odd gift on vacation somewhere new. I tend to start shopping more in depth in early November.


13. Favorite Christmas song?

Lately, “Breath of Heaven” by Amy Grant, though I am also partial to “The Holly and the Ivy” by Bing Crosby.


14. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas?

Praline cookies, also known locally as “Christmas Crack.” It’s THAT addictive!


15. Mail or email Christmas cards?

Are you seriously asking ME this question?!? Mail, and all handmade cards! Just did 12 cards and a gift card holder on Saturday!


16. Worst Christmas gift you received?

Hm. I don’t think I’ve had a really BAD gift, unless you count the horrid Christmas sweaters I used to get in childhood that looked like they were picked by blind shut-in maiden aunts.


17. Favorite Christmas movie?

A Christmas Story! How can you resist “Fra-gee-lay” and Ralphie eating Lifebouy?


18. Travel at Christmas or stay at home?

I like to stay home, but we usually travel, if only the half-hour all the way across town to my mother’s. We try to go to CityOfMyBirth to see all my father and grandmother, but it’s not always possible.


19. Can you name all of Santa’s reindeer?

Of course. I have to teach them to my students every year. I’d be in a real pickle if I didn’t know them.


2o. Angel on top of tree, or star?

Neither. We have a replica of Disney World’s Cinderella Castle, complete with Cinderella. We’re Disney slaves.


21. Open gifts Christmas Eve or Christmas morning?

As a child, we were always allowed to choose one present to open on Christmas Eve, and then all the rest on Christmas morning. As an adult, we have so many relatives to see that we do Christmas Eve at my mother’s house, our own Christmas on Christmas Day morning, and then head over to my mother-in-law’s. My father and my father-in-law are fitted in wherever possible.


22. Most annoying thing about this time of year?

People who knock others over in their haste to get to the best deals. I once saw a woman snatch a Tickle-Me-Elmo out of a little girl’s hands. Sad, really. This year, I saw one woman punch another in the face for stealing her parking place that she was waiting for.


23. Favorite ornament theme or color?

I don’t do the theme or one-color thing. I like to have a multi-colored tree, and I put as many of the special ornaments as I can fit on the tree on there.


24. Favorite for Christmas dinner?

My mother-in-law is FAMOUS for not being able to cook, so we’ve gone to a local Japanese restaurant on Christmas Day for the last 10 years or so. It started off because they were the only thing open, but now it’s become something we look forward to.


25. What do you want for Christmas this year?

Personally, I’d like to lose weight and be healthier. And, I’d like more love for our planet and less war and strife. On a more selfish note, I’ve asked for lots of crafting stuff, and some good books. Otherwise, I want my family to be happy with the things that I’ve gotten them. The giving is the more fun part -- I like watching other people’s reactions more than I like getting things for me.

Saturday, November 29, 2008

When In Doubt: Meme!

Saw this meme on travels across the Internets, so I have appropriated it. Here you go!

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* Name: KLee
* Birthday: October 15th
* Birthplace: CityOfMyBirth
* Current location: HumidityLikeABrickWall
* Eye color: blue
* Hair color: mostly blonde
* Height: 6 foot
* Righty or lefty: righty-tighty!
* Zodiac sign: Libra

LAYER TWO:
* Your heritage: English, Irish, Scots, German, and some assorted Scandinavian thrown in for good measure.
* The shoes you wore today: my black-and-red Disney Crocs.
* Your weakness: books, chocolate, crafting supplies
* Your fears: guns, my spouse or child becoming ill, car accidents.
* Your perfect pizza: Giordano’s Stuffed Pizza’s with double sausage.
* Goals you’d like to achieve: go back to college; travel to Europe again.

LAYER THREE:
* Your most overused phrase on AIM: I don’t use it. It’s INFESTED with spyware!
* Your first waking thoughts: “Just another hour, please!”
* Your best physical feature: eyes
* Your most missed memory: holding my daughter when she was a baby and breathing in the wonderful baby smell.

LAYER FOUR:
* Pepsi or Coke: I’m a Southerner. It’s ALL Coke down here, though I prefer Cherry Coke.
* McDonald’s or Burger King: lately, Burger King. Offspring’s addicted to Whoppers.
* Single or group dates: I haven’t dated in about 20 years, so I abstain.
* Adidas or Nike: Nike. They’ve got good arch support.
* Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Out of those two choices, I prefer Lipton, though it’s basically six of one, one half dozen of another.
* Chocolate or vanilla: Chocolate, baby!
* Cappuccino or coffee: Cappuccino.

LAYER FIVE:
* Smoke: Nope – I’m allergic to cigarette smoke.
* Cuss: Far more than I should!
* Sing: every chance I get!
* Take a shower everyday: Yep – I’m rather finicky about personal odor.
* Do you think you’ve been in love: Yes, a few times, but I’ve found my great love, and we’re still together today!
* Want to go to college: I’d love to go back!
* Liked high school: Yeah, once I got to public school. Private school was akin to torture.
* Want to get married: Already am!
* Believe in yourself: sometimes. Sometimes, not often enough.
* Get motion sickness: Even while standing still. Or by looking at a glass of water.
* Think you’re attractive: No.
* Think you’re a health freak: Definitely not, but I need to be healthier.
* Get along with your parent(s): Most of the time. My dad’s a bit pissed at me at the mo, but he’ll get over it, I hope.
* Like thunderstorms: As long as I don’t have to go out in them.
* Play an instrument: No, but I sure wish I could.

LAYER SIX: In the past month…
* Drank alcohol: eh – I had a small sip of wine at Thanksgiving.
* Smoked: no
* Done a drug: nothing illegal – otherwise, plenty of Excedrin Migraine.
* Made out: Is it still considered “making out” if it’s with your husband?!
* Gone on a date: not really. It doesn’t count if you two take your teenager to dinner, right?
* Gone to the mall: yes
* Eaten an entire box of Oreos: No. I don’t think I’ve ever eaten a whole box of Oreos.
* Eaten sushi: Nope. Allergic to seafood.
* Been on stage: not in the last month, though I’m working on it!
* Been dumped: no
* Gone skating: no
* Made homemade cookies: yes. LOVE cookies!
* Gone skinny dipping: No. I wouldn’t subject people to the sight on my nude flesh. Yeesh!
* Dyed your hair: just missed it – about six weeks ago.
* Stolen Anything: no

LAYER SEVEN: Ever…
* Played a game that required removal of clothing: yes -- we played a lot of Strip Twister in college....
* Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: yes
* Been caught “doing something”: yes
* Been called a tease: yeah, but he was a jerk.
* Gotten beaten up: yes, but I gave as good as I got, and probably better.
* Shoplifted: yes, and my Grandmother caught me, made me apologize, write a letter, AND I got my butt beaten for it by her and THEN my father.
* Changed who you were to fit in: Yes, though it didn’t help in the end.

LAYER EIGHT:
* Age you hope to be married: Well, I was married at 22, so I’ll go with that.
* Numbers and names of children: We have just the one, whom you all know as “Offspring.”.
* Describe your dream wedding: My wedding was held on November 28th in a local park's gazebo. It was beautiful.
* How do you want to die: Painlessly, and when I’m old and ready to go.
* Where you want to go to college: I’d love to go to college in London, but that’s a pipe dream.
* What do you want to be when you grow up: An archaeologist.

* What country would you most like to visit: England, specifically, but anywhere in Europe will do, really.

LAYER NINE:
* Number of drugs taken illegally: None. I’m rather a prude about drugs.
* Number of people I could trust with my life: about six, maybe.
* Number of CDs that I own: Lots. Too many to count.
* Number of piercings: two. One in each ear. They used to be double-pierced, but they grew over LONG ago.
* Number of tattoos: none, though I want a specific one. I once had it priced out, and it was going to be about $600. I’m not white-trash enough to finance a tattoo.
* Number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper: Maybe twenty? Twenty-five? Marriage announcement, Offspring’s birth announcement, play reviews…
* Number of scars on my body: Big Scars – one on my right arm where I had a basal cell carcinoma cut off, one on my left knee where I cut my leg open to the bone, and my right thumb, which was cut off in a car accident when I was 12. Lots of small ones....
* Number of things in my past that I regret: Plenty!

Sunday, November 23, 2008

In Which I Am A Twittery Teenage Girl

My friend (I'll call her "Small, But Sassy") and I have both long been sucked into the world of Stephenie Meyer's "Twilight." I had read books one and two back in the early summer, and had loaned them to S,BS shortly after. We were both hooked but good.

We both loved the storylines and characters, and quickly read and reread books one through three. (S,BS has read book four, which I have not yet done, but she plans to let me borrow her copy tomorrow.) So, when we heard a movie was coming out, we flapped out hands, said "Ohmigawd!" about ten times, and made plans to go.

We went to an afternoon showing today, and mingled with the hordes of Goths who actually braved the sunlight enough to venture out of their dank cubbyholes. We felt a little weirded out that we were probably the oldest people in the theater, but we settled back with popcorn and Cherry Cokes to drool over watch Edward. And everyone else.

I'd seen a lot of reviews that stated that the effects were not all that good, and the cast was full of "nobodies." S,BS and I both enjoyed it, and we plan to stay up late and talk about it on the phone while we paint our nails and trash what everyone in school is wearing. And then we'll look forward to the sequels we're sure are to follow.

Monday, November 17, 2008

A Public Service Announcement

To most normal people, when they are unexpectedly given a gift, they ask for the whys and the wherefores. Not me! To the unexpected gift that I was given today, I will just say THANK YOU! My prayers have been answered, and I am not one to look a gift horse in the mouth.

This will be a MAJOR anti-whine this week!

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Should I?

Or, alternately titled: "My Husband Reserves the Right To Say 'I Told You So.'"

I got an interesting proposition that I want to share with you, and in turn, pick your collective brains about. Most of you who've been reading my blog for a while know that I spent 6 years as a Girl Scout Leader. For anyone other than those three loyal, longtime readers, I spent 6 years as a Girl Scout Leader. My troop went kaflooey in a rather spectacular manner two years ago. It was all a lot of histrionic, middle-school bull that got drawn WAAAY out of proportion, with my family cast as the villains. This was, in no way, close to actual fact. My troop folded, and I've continued volunteering as an adult with my local area, and as a parent in the troop I asked for my daughter to be placed in.

At our adult meeting Tuesday evening, I was approached by someone at our local office who told me that there is tremendous interest for a Daisy troop at my school. Daisies are the youngest level of Scouting, the kindergarten (and now, since the big age-level reorganization) first grade girls. Since, this is the age I teach, and at the very school where most of the interest lies, I was approached as possible leadership for this troop.

Now, there are plenty of pros and cons.

Pros:
*I could ease back into leadership this way.
*I already have a possible co-leader lined up.
*It would be very convenient for me, personally, to meet at my workplace.
*It's an age that I'm VERY familiar with, and so is my potential co-leader.
*There are a lot less "woes" working with the younger girls -- pretty much everyone is happy to be part of the program, and there's not the middle-school attitude to contend with.
*My Girl Scouting mentor did Daisy leadership for YEARS, so I have a good source of ideas and tips at the ready.
*I've been a leader for years, so it's not like it would be ALL new to me.
*Daisies is a two-year program, and I have the option to stay where I am, and have the girls move on without me. This would mean new blood every two years at the most.
*Daisies is a more hands-on, crafting, having fun version of Scouting than some of the other levels, where it's go-go-go all the time.
*My principal has given permission to have meetings in our school buildings. (You would not believe how many schools/principals *don't* allow this!) This is already one dilemma off my back.
*Offspring could help me out occasionally, and could even earn her Program Aide status this way.

Cons:
*Parents. You can never predict if you're gonna get the good ones, or the bad ones.
*Still a possibility for not-so-likeable girls, but possibilities for those are lower the younger the girls are.
*Taking over a leadership role would mean more time away from my family, and more training classes.
*Paperwork out the wazoo, on top of the paperwork that I already keep track of for my local area.
*Cookies. It's a hassle when it's my own daughter, but they're letting Daisies sell cookies this year.
*If I decide to do it, can I get it up and rolling before the new year? If I can't, should we still sell cookies? The order-taking starts in January, so it would be cutting it close.
*It's a lot of work, and can be physically exhausting.
*If I don't do it, these girls probably won't get placed until late spring, at the earliest. A more realistic expectation would be that we lose them entirely, because we have no one willing to step up into the leadership role. I would hate for that to happen.
*Little to no parental help is a distinct possibility. Since we work in an economically disadvantaged school, we are more likely to have parents who either cannot afford to help, or just plain don't want to help. This may mean more personal, out-of-pocket expenses for me. Though, I do not mind doing that AT ALL if the girls benefit.

So, what do you think? Should I take the plunge?I had a lot of heartache with my old troop, but they were much older, and all awash with tween angst and hormones galore. There's no guarantees that there would be a repeat of last time, but there's also nothing to indicate that they'll be angels, either. Anytime you undertake a venture like this, you run the risk of having it all not turn out anything like you planned. But, I think with a good friend who has my back as co-leader; and with girls I'm most likely familiar with already -- maybe it wouldn't be a total disaster.

Am I mental for even considering it? I liked being a leader. I liked teaching girls all about the program, and watching them grow stronger within themselves with the good foundation that Scouting gives them. I like watching them learn, and knowing that I helped them. I did not like all the drama and hurt feelings with my last troop. I really disliked having my daughter exposed to all that: drama, hurt feelings, and maligned and slandered parents. It was almost worse for her, because she not only lost her troop, but she lost her innocence with Scouting as well. She saw people for the manipulative sneaks that they were, and at the cost of her parents' reputations. And it was not pretty.

Should I expose myself, and my family, to all of that again? Is it worth it?

Thursday, August 07, 2008

Where Am I Again?

No sooner than CCW and family drove away from the liquid air we call "humidity" that envelops our city, Offspring and I had to go home and finish packing for a four-day Girl Scout trip that her troop was taking. I was going along as a chaperone/driver, and we had lots to get in the car before our 8am start.

We headed for Helen, Georgia, a small resort town in the Blue Ridge mountains, and what was supposed to be around a five-hour trip from home. We learned a great many things on this trip. Chief among them were:

*What is supposed to be a five hour trip with 13 twelve year old girls will take you eight hours with bathroom stops and lunch.

*We are confirmed flatlanders. Mountains kick our collective tails.

*We stayed at a state park in what was called The Squirrel's Nest. On one of our trips into the park's Trading Post, the ranger working the register asked what section of the park we were staying in. When we told her, she grimaced, and said, "You brave people." We should have known then what we were in for.

*Girls are quite capable as being completely disgusting and flippant about personal hygiene as boys are. I never knew that girls could stink quite that bad.

*We went river tubing, which sounds like it would have been a complete blast, but which turned out to be awful. So awful, I think Dante has it in one of the levels of Hell somewhere. The reason it sucked donkeys was that the area, along with much of the region, is having a drought and the river levels were way down. I became very intimate with every damn rock in the river. Mostly on my shins and knees. I look like I was viciously mauled by a toddler. Pictures don't do it justice. I scraped both palms raw, both knees raw, and bruises from what feels like stem to stern. Had it actually been the normal river level, I think I would have enjoyed that experience, but couldn't this way.

*We're not real fond of being attacked by gigantic moths in the bathhouse while we shower. Just sayin'.

*When you have a Girl Scout who needs desperately to go to the bathroom at 3am, it is best to not critique your appearance in the mirror just then. Yes, your hair looks like crap -- it's 3am, and you're wearing a miner's headlamp. Get over yourself.

Despite all that, it was a fun trip. A lot of fun was had, and the girls all seemed to have a great time. I feel fricking old, but that didn't seem to faze them any.

Now, I have about a 24-hour turnaround time to wash clothes, catch up on saved TiVo programs, and repack for an 8am Saturday departure to Disney World. I'll post at some paint, but I can't tell you when.

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Flaming Red Skin and Burning Ears

Offspring had a Girl Scout trip on Saturday to a small waterpark about an hour away from our town. Parents were allowed to attend, and moreover *needed* to attend to get all 22 girls there and back.

I went, and of course, got sunburned. Despite having put sunblock on THREE times in the five hours we were there, and wearing a t-shirt the whole time. The sunburn was bad enough, but it only lasted for about 36 hours before it no longer stung like a mother. I also seemed to have come home with an ear infection in my right ear.

It *hurts.* I took lots of over the counter medications for it yesterday, and that did help ease the pain off. I originally was thinking that I'd maybe gotten a scratch down in the ear canal or something, but it still hurts, even after applications of hydrogen peroxide AND alcohol.

I have a doctor's appointment for later this afternoon, and hopefully, they'll give me something that will allow me to sleep decently tonight.

Thursday, July 24, 2008

Being A Productive Member of Society

Offspring is in Art Camp during the day all this week, so I've actually had to curtail my nocturnal urges and go to bed at decent hours. She has to be at the camp location at nine every morning, so I'm trying to stay awake and be a real, live contributing member to society while she's gone.

I met a friend for lunch and shopping yesterday, and today, I plan on making a trip to Kinko's to photocopy some documents for my father. I also may make a stop to the local craft emporium for a design element that I need for an upcoming project.

Tomorrow, Offspring finishes camp and JF and I plan on attending the Parent Art Show in the afternoon to see what she learned this week. Saturday comes with plans to attend a little water park in a nearby town for a Girl Scout outing. I have cleaned a good bit of my house, and am no longer quite so embarrassed to open the door to deliverymen and passing Jehovah's Witnesses.

I'm spending time working on craft projects, and getting ready for the upcoming fun stuff that I have planned, including a bloggy meetup with CCW. I'm hoping that we don't scare her and her family off when they visit the area in a week or so. Here's hoping!