I'm sorry that I have been posting even less than normal lately, but I seem to have no time at all. School is eating up my days, and most of my nights. All is going well on the college front (I got an A on my midterm -- hooray!) but we're heading down the home stretch towards finals. This means more studying and more assignments.
I spent today at home sick. Woke up this morning with a 101-degree fever and some stomach-churning. After being sick one time, the nausea thankfully subsided. Now I'm just left with the odd fever spike and a feeling like I have a box of Triscuits stuck up my nose.
Despite the yuck, I had an assignment to write and upload to my professor before class tomorrow. I'm a little mad at Blackboard -- they've removed the automatic grade average (the "weighted total") at the bottom, though this may be in my best interest, since I checked it rather obsessively. I got the assignment finished and uploaded, and made dinner (tacos) and some cupcakes for my troop's Birthday Party for Juliette Low on Thursday. Instead of posting, I should be working on my next assignment, but I am officially putting that off until Friday night.
Currently, we are observing a time-honored family tradition: the Annual Watching of The Great Pumpkin. This is a ritual strictly observed in our household, with non-believers being labeled as "commies." Offspring expressed an interest in NOT watching The Great Pumpkin this year, and her father questioned her paternity, and my truthfulness as her mother. There was even some mild cursing. JF then turned on BOTH televisions to maximize the Pumpkin-y goodness, and proceeded to insist that tradition be observed and maintained. I will keep you posted on whether Offspring remains shunned from the family unit or not.
Showing posts with label Juggling Freak. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Juggling Freak. Show all posts
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Saturday, August 01, 2009
Wrong On So Many Levels
Offspring has outgrown so many things lately that it's getting hard to keep track. She once used to BEG us to tune the satellite radio to Radio Disney, but that has long gone the way of the dodo. I don't think I've seen my delicate flower of womanhood in a dress in about 2 years, at the least. She's dropped cartoons and Disney Channel shows for Japanese anime shows, which she discusses at great lengths with her friends. Also long gone are the crafty projects that we used to do together and the little-girl fascination with nail polish and horses. These days, the nail polish is black, and the only horses I see are the ones that she draws getting hacked to bits in samurai battles. (Well, maybe that last is a bit of an exaggeration. They aren't "samurai" battles, they're demons who fight using parts of their souls. And, generally, there aren't any horses to speak of.)
We used to watch a lot of kids TV -- anyone who has kids of a certain age know exactly what I mean when I say I watched a full boatload of "Blue's Clues". Offspring had certain videotapes that she watched with approaching near-religious fervor. Among those tapes (and see; it was so long ago that they were TAPES, not DVDs.) was "Big Bird Goes to Japan", which might have been the starting point for the love of all things Japanese she currently exhibits; and a bajillion "Rugrats" episodes. Her most favorite, though, were the Disney Sing-Along tapes. We watched the Christmas and Halloween ones at least once a week, and usually a lot more often than that. We actually wore out VHS copies of both of those tapes, requiring new ones because the screaming without them was hideous to hear.
Then there were the shows that we tried desperately to keep her away from because they made her father and I want to shove icepicks deep within our own brains. "Barney" was pretty much universally hated, and was something she only watched at other people's houses. I think we had her convinced that Barney tapes could only live at other people's houses, and we weren't allowed to own them. I particularly hated "Caillou," and still do , even unto this day. He's such a whiny little prat that I want to smack him. I can't have it on at school, or the red haze descends, and pretty soon I'm being called in the office for yelling inappropriate things at the TV and waving appendages in the air that should not be waved when children are about.
Juggling Freak's favorite show had to be The Big Comfy Couch. He had a serious thing for Loonette the Clown, and even today will make lewd comments about her, and the size of her...um...melons. (Hey, I said it was wrong on so many levels! I warned you ahead of time!) Instead of walking around the house singing, "...on the big, comfy couch!", JF walked about singing the praises of "...the big-breasted clown!" I used to chuck small toys and pacifiers at him when I heard his more-risque version of that theme song, but worse BY FAR was his fascination with the Clock Rug Stretch. It was embarrassing to see a grown man drool and say, "C'mon nine-fifteen!"
It makes me glad that Offspring outgrew that particular show.....
We used to watch a lot of kids TV -- anyone who has kids of a certain age know exactly what I mean when I say I watched a full boatload of "Blue's Clues". Offspring had certain videotapes that she watched with approaching near-religious fervor. Among those tapes (and see; it was so long ago that they were TAPES, not DVDs.) was "Big Bird Goes to Japan", which might have been the starting point for the love of all things Japanese she currently exhibits; and a bajillion "Rugrats" episodes. Her most favorite, though, were the Disney Sing-Along tapes. We watched the Christmas and Halloween ones at least once a week, and usually a lot more often than that. We actually wore out VHS copies of both of those tapes, requiring new ones because the screaming without them was hideous to hear.
Then there were the shows that we tried desperately to keep her away from because they made her father and I want to shove icepicks deep within our own brains. "Barney" was pretty much universally hated, and was something she only watched at other people's houses. I think we had her convinced that Barney tapes could only live at other people's houses, and we weren't allowed to own them. I particularly hated "Caillou," and still do , even unto this day. He's such a whiny little prat that I want to smack him. I can't have it on at school, or the red haze descends, and pretty soon I'm being called in the office for yelling inappropriate things at the TV and waving appendages in the air that should not be waved when children are about.
Juggling Freak's favorite show had to be The Big Comfy Couch. He had a serious thing for Loonette the Clown, and even today will make lewd comments about her, and the size of her...um...melons. (Hey, I said it was wrong on so many levels! I warned you ahead of time!) Instead of walking around the house singing, "...on the big, comfy couch!", JF walked about singing the praises of "...the big-breasted clown!" I used to chuck small toys and pacifiers at him when I heard his more-risque version of that theme song, but worse BY FAR was his fascination with the Clock Rug Stretch. It was embarrassing to see a grown man drool and say, "C'mon nine-fifteen!"
It makes me glad that Offspring outgrew that particular show.....
Friday, March 06, 2009
Woman On Fire
I know posting has been down to an all-time low here lately, and for that I'm sorry. I just don't how many ways I can say "I'm not dead yet, but I'm fresh out of blog fodder" without making your heads explode. I know *I'm* getting tired of hearing that, and it's my blog!
School has been a bug-bear. I seem to have the royal knack for pissing people off lately. There's a lot of pressure on teachers these days -- it seems like if we sneeze, we piss a parent or three off. I have a child who is a Jehovah's Witness, and while we don't want to offend the family, we DO still have to teach the child about holidays and the like. If for no other reason because we teach calendar skills, and if we ask what the holiday in March is, the answer would be St. Patrick's Day. That is not a deliberate slight to people who don't celebrate St. Patrick's Day, but we can't NOT teach that because one family doesn't approve. You know what I mean?
My new Girl Scout troop is going well -- there are 17 of them! I was worried that I wouldn't have enough to make up a troop (which is five) and here I am with one of the largest troops in our area! I'm liking it. Most of them seem very excited to be there, and they seem to be happy with all of the things we've done so far. I've got some not-so-attentive parents, but I chalk a lot of that up to the fact that I don't see them every meeting.
Juggling Freak's birthday is next week. I was torn with what to get him this year, and seriously considered a unicycle. He, understandably, wants to TRY OUT a unicycle first to make sure he doesn't kill himself on it. This sounds awfully cautious of him. This is also the man who wants to flamethrower our big oak tree in the backyard because it sheds bushels of leaves no matter WHAT season it happens to be. This is also the man who got on a wild hair at a woodpecker who was pecking our house, and would have killed it, had we actual firearms in the house and not just a black powder replica. Now, I freely admit that by the end of that particular situation, I would have gleefully killed that woodpecker myself for pecking my bedroom eaves at seven in the damn morning every Saturday. Instead, we tried all the things the avian vets recommended: nasty-tasting sprays, decoy birds, changing the wood out. None of that worked. JF finally paintball-gunned it away. I hope he didn't kill the bird, but I also hope he's too scared to ever come back.
Offspring is tempermental. It's the age. Half the time, she pretends we're not there, and when she's forced to actually --UGH -- *interact* with us, she does a lot of eye-rolling and grunting. Then when she wants something, I hear "Mommy...." She hasn't called me Mommy since she was about seven. Not unless she's angling for something. We've actually all been sick, and she's been more lovey since being sick. I think we all sort of revert to childhood when we feel unwell, and she's holding true to that.
Speaking of sick, we've all been passing around a virus of some sort within our family. I have spent most of this week with sinus congestion of massive proportions, so much so that I had supressed hearing in one ear due to cloggage on Wednesday. My throat has been so raw that I have honestly LOOKED FORWARD to taking NyQuil just for the numbing effect. I took Mucinex, which tastes like bug spray, just to get some relief. This illness, whatever it is, has kicked our collective asses in a MAJOR way this week. My throat is no longer on fire, but JF has been stumbling around with fevers of 102 and 103. Not good in adults. I'm surprised he's been able to function. I know I got all muzzy-headed, and I wasn't battling fever, just congestion.
So, that's all I got. Not much. Still alive, though not really feeling like "alive" fits after this week. Just surviving.
School has been a bug-bear. I seem to have the royal knack for pissing people off lately. There's a lot of pressure on teachers these days -- it seems like if we sneeze, we piss a parent or three off. I have a child who is a Jehovah's Witness, and while we don't want to offend the family, we DO still have to teach the child about holidays and the like. If for no other reason because we teach calendar skills, and if we ask what the holiday in March is, the answer would be St. Patrick's Day. That is not a deliberate slight to people who don't celebrate St. Patrick's Day, but we can't NOT teach that because one family doesn't approve. You know what I mean?
My new Girl Scout troop is going well -- there are 17 of them! I was worried that I wouldn't have enough to make up a troop (which is five) and here I am with one of the largest troops in our area! I'm liking it. Most of them seem very excited to be there, and they seem to be happy with all of the things we've done so far. I've got some not-so-attentive parents, but I chalk a lot of that up to the fact that I don't see them every meeting.
Juggling Freak's birthday is next week. I was torn with what to get him this year, and seriously considered a unicycle. He, understandably, wants to TRY OUT a unicycle first to make sure he doesn't kill himself on it. This sounds awfully cautious of him. This is also the man who wants to flamethrower our big oak tree in the backyard because it sheds bushels of leaves no matter WHAT season it happens to be. This is also the man who got on a wild hair at a woodpecker who was pecking our house, and would have killed it, had we actual firearms in the house and not just a black powder replica. Now, I freely admit that by the end of that particular situation, I would have gleefully killed that woodpecker myself for pecking my bedroom eaves at seven in the damn morning every Saturday. Instead, we tried all the things the avian vets recommended: nasty-tasting sprays, decoy birds, changing the wood out. None of that worked. JF finally paintball-gunned it away. I hope he didn't kill the bird, but I also hope he's too scared to ever come back.
Offspring is tempermental. It's the age. Half the time, she pretends we're not there, and when she's forced to actually --UGH -- *interact* with us, she does a lot of eye-rolling and grunting. Then when she wants something, I hear "Mommy...." She hasn't called me Mommy since she was about seven. Not unless she's angling for something. We've actually all been sick, and she's been more lovey since being sick. I think we all sort of revert to childhood when we feel unwell, and she's holding true to that.
Speaking of sick, we've all been passing around a virus of some sort within our family. I have spent most of this week with sinus congestion of massive proportions, so much so that I had supressed hearing in one ear due to cloggage on Wednesday. My throat has been so raw that I have honestly LOOKED FORWARD to taking NyQuil just for the numbing effect. I took Mucinex, which tastes like bug spray, just to get some relief. This illness, whatever it is, has kicked our collective asses in a MAJOR way this week. My throat is no longer on fire, but JF has been stumbling around with fevers of 102 and 103. Not good in adults. I'm surprised he's been able to function. I know I got all muzzy-headed, and I wasn't battling fever, just congestion.
So, that's all I got. Not much. Still alive, though not really feeling like "alive" fits after this week. Just surviving.
Friday, December 19, 2008
Break Out The Peppermint Schnapps-- School's Over!
In honor of the momentous occasion of two paid weeks off from work *and* no rambunctious little charges to herd like a farmer, I give you a Christmas-themed meme.
I don't remember were I got this from. Either I stole it from one of the people I read, or I stole it from one of the people THEY read. Or, maybe I got it as a mass-email and decided it would be good blog fodder. In any case, here you go!
----------------------------------
1. Wrapping paper or gift bags?
I actually LIKE wrapping presents. However, there are always those oddly-shaped items that you have to resort to a bag for. I typically do NOT use bags for Juggling Freak and Offspring simply because they are peekers. I thought that Hallmark’s motion-activated gift bags this year would be a great solution for the Incredibly Sneaky-Peeky Duo, but the cat would most likely set it off at 3 in the morning, and I’d have to kill her.
2. Real tree or artificial?
Real trees are best, especially for the scent, but they’re so messy. We got an artificial when Offspring was small, and we’ve used an artificial ever since.
3. When do you put up the tree?
Juggling Freak is a total Scrooge who refuses to do one single iota of Christmas decorating until it is actually December. Usually, we do the tree on the first weekend of December.
4. When do you take the tree down?
As soon as I can fully admit to myself that the holiday is once again over. (sigh.)
5. Do you like egg nog?
Blargh! No. I’ll repeat my answer from last year’s meme – drinking eggnog is like saying you want to get a little drunk, but you also want some pancakes.
6. Favorite gift received as a child?
I have a few that I remember quite fondly. I had a plastic cow that drank water and you could then milk a very watery, white “milk” from her plastic udders. It was probably made in China and highly toxic, but it was the 70s, and no one thought about stuff like that then.
7. Hardest person to buy for?
My parents. My mother has absolutely EVERYTHING, and my father gets harder to buy for each year.
8. Easiest person to buy for?
Offspring. I am usually pretty well versed on what is or is not to her taste. Though, as she gets older, she gets harder to buy for. It’s not all toys and dolls anymore.
9. Do you have a nativity scene?
No. The one I used to have was made out of glass, and the blasted cat shattered some of the pieces years back. However, we do have several Playmobil advent calendars, which are lots of fun.
10. Have you ever recycled a Christmas gift?
Yes. Usually stuff that I get from students, because really – how many lotions from Bath and Body Works does one REALLY need?
11. Lights on a Christmas Tree?
Hells, yeah! The more the better, in my opinion! Juggling Freak says that I like so many lights on the tree that you can get a tan by sitting by it.
12. When do you start shopping?
I sort of look around all year long, and will very occasionally pick up the odd gift on vacation somewhere new. I tend to start shopping more in depth in early November.
13. Favorite Christmas song?
Lately, “Breath of Heaven” by Amy Grant, though I am also partial to “The Holly and the Ivy” by Bing Crosby.
14. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas?
Praline cookies, also known locally as “Christmas Crack.” It’s THAT addictive!
15. Mail or email Christmas cards?
Are you seriously asking ME this question?!? Mail, and all handmade cards! Just did 12 cards and a gift card holder on Saturday!
16. Worst Christmas gift you received?
Hm. I don’t think I’ve had a really BAD gift, unless you count the horrid Christmas sweaters I used to get in childhood that looked like they were picked by blind shut-in maiden aunts.
17. Favorite Christmas movie?
A Christmas Story! How can you resist “Fra-gee-lay” and Ralphie eating Lifebouy?
18. Travel at Christmas or stay at home?
I like to stay home, but we usually travel, if only the half-hour all the way across town to my mother’s. We try to go to CityOfMyBirth to see all my father and grandmother, but it’s not always possible.
19. Can you name all of Santa’s reindeer?
Of course. I have to teach them to my students every year. I’d be in a real pickle if I didn’t know them.
2o. Angel on top of tree, or star?
Neither. We have a replica of Disney World’s Cinderella Castle, complete with Cinderella. We’re Disney slaves.
21. Open gifts Christmas Eve or Christmas morning?
As a child, we were always allowed to choose one present to open on Christmas Eve, and then all the rest on Christmas morning. As an adult, we have so many relatives to see that we do Christmas Eve at my mother’s house, our own Christmas on Christmas Day morning, and then head over to my mother-in-law’s. My father and my father-in-law are fitted in wherever possible.
22. Most annoying thing about this time of year?
People who knock others over in their haste to get to the best deals. I once saw a woman snatch a Tickle-Me-Elmo out of a little girl’s hands. Sad, really. This year, I saw one woman punch another in the face for stealing her parking place that she was waiting for.
23. Favorite ornament theme or color?
I don’t do the theme or one-color thing. I like to have a multi-colored tree, and I put as many of the special ornaments as I can fit on the tree on there.
24. Favorite for Christmas dinner?
My mother-in-law is FAMOUS for not being able to cook, so we’ve gone to a local Japanese restaurant on Christmas Day for the last 10 years or so. It started off because they were the only thing open, but now it’s become something we look forward to.
25. What do you want for Christmas this year?
Personally, I’d like to lose weight and be healthier. And, I’d like more love for our planet and less war and strife. On a more selfish note, I’ve asked for lots of crafting stuff, and some good books. Otherwise, I want my family to be happy with the things that I’ve gotten them. The giving is the more fun part -- I like watching other people’s reactions more than I like getting things for me.
I don't remember were I got this from. Either I stole it from one of the people I read, or I stole it from one of the people THEY read. Or, maybe I got it as a mass-email and decided it would be good blog fodder. In any case, here you go!
----------------------------------
1. Wrapping paper or gift bags?
I actually LIKE wrapping presents. However, there are always those oddly-shaped items that you have to resort to a bag for. I typically do NOT use bags for Juggling Freak and Offspring simply because they are peekers. I thought that Hallmark’s motion-activated gift bags this year would be a great solution for the Incredibly Sneaky-Peeky Duo, but the cat would most likely set it off at 3 in the morning, and I’d have to kill her.
2. Real tree or artificial?
Real trees are best, especially for the scent, but they’re so messy. We got an artificial when Offspring was small, and we’ve used an artificial ever since.
3. When do you put up the tree?
Juggling Freak is a total Scrooge who refuses to do one single iota of Christmas decorating until it is actually December. Usually, we do the tree on the first weekend of December.
4. When do you take the tree down?
As soon as I can fully admit to myself that the holiday is once again over. (sigh.)
5. Do you like egg nog?
Blargh! No. I’ll repeat my answer from last year’s meme – drinking eggnog is like saying you want to get a little drunk, but you also want some pancakes.
6. Favorite gift received as a child?
I have a few that I remember quite fondly. I had a plastic cow that drank water and you could then milk a very watery, white “milk” from her plastic udders. It was probably made in China and highly toxic, but it was the 70s, and no one thought about stuff like that then.
7. Hardest person to buy for?
My parents. My mother has absolutely EVERYTHING, and my father gets harder to buy for each year.
8. Easiest person to buy for?
Offspring. I am usually pretty well versed on what is or is not to her taste. Though, as she gets older, she gets harder to buy for. It’s not all toys and dolls anymore.
9. Do you have a nativity scene?
No. The one I used to have was made out of glass, and the blasted cat shattered some of the pieces years back. However, we do have several Playmobil advent calendars, which are lots of fun.
10. Have you ever recycled a Christmas gift?
Yes. Usually stuff that I get from students, because really – how many lotions from Bath and Body Works does one REALLY need?
11. Lights on a Christmas Tree?
Hells, yeah! The more the better, in my opinion! Juggling Freak says that I like so many lights on the tree that you can get a tan by sitting by it.
12. When do you start shopping?
I sort of look around all year long, and will very occasionally pick up the odd gift on vacation somewhere new. I tend to start shopping more in depth in early November.
13. Favorite Christmas song?
Lately, “Breath of Heaven” by Amy Grant, though I am also partial to “The Holly and the Ivy” by Bing Crosby.
14. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas?
Praline cookies, also known locally as “Christmas Crack.” It’s THAT addictive!
15. Mail or email Christmas cards?
Are you seriously asking ME this question?!? Mail, and all handmade cards! Just did 12 cards and a gift card holder on Saturday!
16. Worst Christmas gift you received?
Hm. I don’t think I’ve had a really BAD gift, unless you count the horrid Christmas sweaters I used to get in childhood that looked like they were picked by blind shut-in maiden aunts.
17. Favorite Christmas movie?
A Christmas Story! How can you resist “Fra-gee-lay” and Ralphie eating Lifebouy?
18. Travel at Christmas or stay at home?
I like to stay home, but we usually travel, if only the half-hour all the way across town to my mother’s. We try to go to CityOfMyBirth to see all my father and grandmother, but it’s not always possible.
19. Can you name all of Santa’s reindeer?
Of course. I have to teach them to my students every year. I’d be in a real pickle if I didn’t know them.
2o. Angel on top of tree, or star?
Neither. We have a replica of Disney World’s Cinderella Castle, complete with Cinderella. We’re Disney slaves.
21. Open gifts Christmas Eve or Christmas morning?
As a child, we were always allowed to choose one present to open on Christmas Eve, and then all the rest on Christmas morning. As an adult, we have so many relatives to see that we do Christmas Eve at my mother’s house, our own Christmas on Christmas Day morning, and then head over to my mother-in-law’s. My father and my father-in-law are fitted in wherever possible.
22. Most annoying thing about this time of year?
People who knock others over in their haste to get to the best deals. I once saw a woman snatch a Tickle-Me-Elmo out of a little girl’s hands. Sad, really. This year, I saw one woman punch another in the face for stealing her parking place that she was waiting for.
23. Favorite ornament theme or color?
I don’t do the theme or one-color thing. I like to have a multi-colored tree, and I put as many of the special ornaments as I can fit on the tree on there.
24. Favorite for Christmas dinner?
My mother-in-law is FAMOUS for not being able to cook, so we’ve gone to a local Japanese restaurant on Christmas Day for the last 10 years or so. It started off because they were the only thing open, but now it’s become something we look forward to.
25. What do you want for Christmas this year?
Personally, I’d like to lose weight and be healthier. And, I’d like more love for our planet and less war and strife. On a more selfish note, I’ve asked for lots of crafting stuff, and some good books. Otherwise, I want my family to be happy with the things that I’ve gotten them. The giving is the more fun part -- I like watching other people’s reactions more than I like getting things for me.
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
Quite Possibly The Weirdest Thing I've Said All Month
Offspring wanted to go to the toy store the other night, so we planned to head to the local Toys Ain't Cheap to find the item that she wanted. I warned her that we weren't going to stay all night.
KLee: "We can't stay all night."
Offspring: "Yes, ma'am."
KLee: "We have to get home. I promised your father that I'd shave his back."
Porpoise Man lives!
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Juggling Freak: 38 Special
Dear Juggling Freak:
Happy Birthday! You turn 38 today, and I just wanted to take a minute to tell you how much I love you, and how glad I am that you belong to Offspring and me. That you are special, and funny, and a good husband and father.
A few days ago, you did a favor for a friend, and then that person told you that you truly are "a nice guy -- everyone thinks so!" I don't *think* so, I KNOW so. I hope you take heed of those words, because they ring true. You ARE a good guy. You are your own worst critic (as most of us are) and you often do not give yourself credit where you deserve it. I think you do deserve it, and you are too harsh in your judgment of yourself. Don't sell yourself short.
I hope your birthday was a good one. I'm sorry that there wasn't more fuss made over you, but you are worth a whole lot of fuss, in our opinion.
I love you.
Happy Birthday! You turn 38 today, and I just wanted to take a minute to tell you how much I love you, and how glad I am that you belong to Offspring and me. That you are special, and funny, and a good husband and father.
A few days ago, you did a favor for a friend, and then that person told you that you truly are "a nice guy -- everyone thinks so!" I don't *think* so, I KNOW so. I hope you take heed of those words, because they ring true. You ARE a good guy. You are your own worst critic (as most of us are) and you often do not give yourself credit where you deserve it. I think you do deserve it, and you are too harsh in your judgment of yourself. Don't sell yourself short.
I hope your birthday was a good one. I'm sorry that there wasn't more fuss made over you, but you are worth a whole lot of fuss, in our opinion.
I love you.
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