This is one of those times that I HATE having a pseudonymous blog -- I have a situation that I'm dying to discuss with you all, and hash out in the smallest of details, but if I do choose to talk about it, I have to be so vague and non-specific about everything that I end up sounding like either a) a bad philosophy student, or b) stoned out of my gourd.
I'll give it a shot, nonetheless.
I have a personal situation brewing right now that is going to be bad, no matter how you slice it. Feelings are going to be hurt, people will feel betrayed, and friendships will end. I can see this all ahead very clearly, but am powerless to stop it, or even to minimize the impact. Sort of how time seems to slow down when you're in a collision -- you can't avoid it, and you can't help but see it as almost a dispassionate observer.
What makes matters worse, however, is that I've been asked to take charge of the situation. To helm the sinking ship, as it were. I can't do it because of time constraints anyway, but to be asked to take something that's broken and bleeding and FIX it? And to be asked by some of the people that broke it in the first place?
It would be a hard enough job to do on its own, much less while trying to mend the damage, soothe injured spirits and feelings, and bring all of the parties left standing back together as a cohesive whole. I can't do it. Not only because I have too much already demanding my time, but also because I think that there just might not be healing to be had from some of this.
All I can say is: you are a poor friend when you only look out for number one. If you aren't willing to give a hand to people you SAY you care about, then you don't deserve their friendship.
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