The No-Good, Terrible, Horrible, Very Bad Day

As some of you may have read over at Phantom's Wednesday Whine, I am. not. having. a. good. day. I mean, I've always viewed my life as a sort of Comedy Of Errors sort of deal, but today takes the cake.

I started off my day by getting bitten all over my right foot by fire ants. This was a really spectacular start to the day. Then, my students were completely out of their minds, testing every boundary that we've ever established. I have one little miscreant who has taught my three other miscreants how to flip birdies, and they think this is the coolest thing since sliced bread. I am. going. to. kill. them. So, we had to spend our (sadly needed) outside time going over the school rules instead of playing. I made the miscreants sit on their hands while I wrote notes to their mothers.

A little later in the day, I was called into my assistant principal's office where I sort of got in trouble. It wasn't anything major, but enough to make the day that much more enjoyable. And, to make the day that much more special, my tendonitis in my wrist has been acting up. I wore my wrist brace to work to help alleviate the pain, and took my prescription pain meds for it as well. On my way back to the classroom, I was stung by wasps that appeared from nowhere. One flies down into my brace and stings me on my hand. Two others sting me on the butt where the gluteus join the leg. I now have to trot myself off to bare my bottom to the school nurse. What fun. Never having been stung by a wasp before, the nurse makes me hang around for a while to make sure I don't have a reaction. I look like I've been slapped hard on the butt *and* punctured with a large-bore hypodermic.

I had had plans to go grocery shopping after work, but the wasps stings are making my leg hurt, and walking around is not making me a happy camper. As I leave the store, the entrance is clogged with people because it's now *raining.* Of course it is. And not just raining. It's Noah's flood out there!

I'm wearing sandals (yay, open toed shoes that let the ants right in!) and they immediately get soaked in the splashing. So, now I'm soaked, my shoes are all slippery and squishy, and the Very Thin Shirt that I had chosen to wear to work was plastered to my body like I was a waif-thin model on a runway. The rain is cold. Cold rain + plastery thin shirt on fat lady = wet t-shirt contest for rednecks.

To wind the day up, I get a call from my Girl Scout co-leader who tells me an interesting story. Apparently, the mother that had all the Issues with me and is not letting her daughter return to my troop in the fall is telling all of our other parents that I did something to her daughter, and *that's* the reason she's not returning. Never mind that a) I never did anything but love that child; b) my co-leader was present at EVERY meeting and does not remember any incident where I offended or hurt said child; and c) I have seen that child three times so far this year in the school setting, and she's hugged me every time. Does this sound like a child I've hurt? This woman is going down.

I'm going to finish my Kool-aid and go to bed before some other awful thing can happen.