I've been managing to stay busy this summer, which has been a blessing in itself. Not only does it keep me from becoming so sedentary that I threaten to petrify like a fossil, it has also had the added benefit of giving me very little time to dwell on things.
Those of you who have known me for any decent length of time know a little bit about my backstory; know a little bit about my past. You know that I raped when I was 20 years old. April and June are always hard months for me, because I tend to dwell on the rape and the aftermath. June is especially hard because I tend to give in to "what if"-itis -- that little mind-screw I do to myself where I obsess over the abortion and the child that would have resulted. Would it be a boy or a girl? Would she/he look like me, or like the rapist? Who would I be now? Who would the child be? Could I love it enough? Would I have kept it? Keeping myself from thinking about that child, who now be old enough to graduate from high school.
Probably the worst part of all of this is the guilt that I lay at my own doorstep in the whole sorry situation. I was raped by someone I knew, someone I was dating. And, for some people, "date rape" just doesn't register with them. Generally, these are the same people who don't think a man can rape his wife, simply because there's a history and a marriage certificate there, but that's neither here nor there. There is still a lot of stigma associated with rape, and especially with date rape. There's always an air of "what did you do to deserve it?" when you tell people that you were date raped.
I try not to think about it, but it was a very formative experience, occurring at a time when most young people are moving out of the family home and trying their wings for the first time. When they are beginning to forge their own path in this world, and to let go of their dependence on Mom and Dad and to live as adults themselves. I was in college, working hard. I was taking a full complement of classes, and was working three jobs; two at the college, and every shift I could pick up at the local movie theater. I had plans to move into my own place with a couple of friends, and we were looking forward to freedom. Looking forward to being adults on our own; and on our own terms.
And then, all of a sudden, I wasn't. I was frozen in place by the rape. Time stopped for me. I was scared to go out, scared to walk across the quad by myself. Checking the locks on the windows and doors compulsively, and imagining every shadow was closing in on me. I was never very self-confident to begin with, and after the rape, I had virtually nothing at all. No confidence, no energy, no bravery. It was all gone. He stole so much more than just sex from me. My safety, my sense of wonder, my sex. Never being thin to begin with, I began to hide under multiple layers of clothes until I looked as round as I was tall. Maybe all those layers would protect me, or at least discourage any other would-be attacker. I became asexual, hiding under layers, and behind a curtain of shaggy hair.
During the counseling session I had to attend before the abortion, the therapist postulated that maybe I "stay fat" because it's safe. That I deliberately try to make myself unattractive so that I'm not a target for other men, other predators. This used to make me sad, thinking that my dislike of myself was so strong that I would deliberately choose to alienate myself from the rest of the world through obesity. And then, one day, I thought, "Fuck you! I was fat WHEN I was raped! It didn't seem to matter so much to him!" And that's because rape isn't about attractiveness, it's about power and control. It's about being able to bend someone so totally to your will, whether it's through manipulation or aggression. In my case, it was a sneak attack, but the mind-screw that came with it afterward was sheer power through manipulation. So, not only did I get raped, I also got fucked over by the system, too. Being fat never made me feel safe. It still doesn't. It makes me feel unloveable and undervalued, but that's a whole other kettle of fish.
So, I've spent my time working this summer, concentrating on the class that I'm taking, and trying not to dwell on the things that usually pull me down into the mire around this time of year. Trying not to pity myself, and play the what-if game. Instead, I thank God for the things that I do have, and feel grateful that I made it through to the other side, rough though the journey was. It has shaped me, both for better and for worse. I try not to think about the child that never will be. And, most of all, I try to forgive myself and let go.
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Friday, July 17, 2009
Migraines Suck!
As if many of you didn't know already, I am here to inform you of the vast suckitutde of migraine headaches. Never say I'm not informative.
I've been on migraine medication for about two months now; stuff that was SUPPOSED to not only lessen the severity of my migraines, but also to lessen the frequency of said migraines. I am here to formally call bullshit on the severity aspect. Any time you can vomit on yourself and not really give a damn because your brain is threatening to explode, I don't think you can chalk that one in the "less severe" column.
Also, this medication was supposed to free me from the cares and worries of migraine headaches, and it hasn't done that, either. Damn those lying advertising people! I would say "heads will roll!" at this point, but I think my own head did enough of that last night, and I really don't wish it on anyone else. Even to the people I dislike intensely.
I've been on migraine medication for about two months now; stuff that was SUPPOSED to not only lessen the severity of my migraines, but also to lessen the frequency of said migraines. I am here to formally call bullshit on the severity aspect. Any time you can vomit on yourself and not really give a damn because your brain is threatening to explode, I don't think you can chalk that one in the "less severe" column.
Also, this medication was supposed to free me from the cares and worries of migraine headaches, and it hasn't done that, either. Damn those lying advertising people! I would say "heads will roll!" at this point, but I think my own head did enough of that last night, and I really don't wish it on anyone else. Even to the people I dislike intensely.
Friday, July 10, 2009
In Celebration of 100 Years
Most of you who are long-time readers will remember that I am a Girl Scout Leader, and I'm about to start my 9th year as an adult volunteer. I have spent quite a few years devoted to helping the young women of my area become proud, strong women of tomorrow, and I've been grateful for the opportunity to do it.
The Girl Scouts of the USA was founded in 1912, and that means we're getting very close to celebrating our centennial anniversary. The Girl Scout Advocacy Network is trying to drum up support for a bill introduced to the get the US Mint to release a special $1 commemorative coin.
If you are so inclined, please follow this link, and ask your local officials to help get this bill passed.
http://www.girlscouts4girls.org/girlscouts/home/
We will need 290 House co-sponsors, and 67 in the Senate. Congress only approves 2 coins a year, and things need to happen quickly if we are to meet the 2012 deadline. If you care about a Girl Scout, please help. Thank you.
(The Public Service Announcement is now over. You may all return to your normal websurfing.)
The Girl Scouts of the USA was founded in 1912, and that means we're getting very close to celebrating our centennial anniversary. The Girl Scout Advocacy Network is trying to drum up support for a bill introduced to the get the US Mint to release a special $1 commemorative coin.
If you are so inclined, please follow this link, and ask your local officials to help get this bill passed.
http://www.girlscouts4girls.org/girlscouts/home/
We will need 290 House co-sponsors, and 67 in the Senate. Congress only approves 2 coins a year, and things need to happen quickly if we are to meet the 2012 deadline. If you care about a Girl Scout, please help. Thank you.
(The Public Service Announcement is now over. You may all return to your normal websurfing.)
Thursday, July 02, 2009
More To Love
I'm not a reality-TV kind of gal. In the main, I don't care for reality TV at all. I never got into American Idol, and I haven't ever seen an episode of Survivor or The Hills. (I mainly watch Joel McHale of The Soup trash The Hills.)
I will admit to an unhealthy fixation to Bravo's Top Chef, though I don't really consider that a Reality TV show. I got really into TC late in season 2, so I didn't really have a vested interest in who won. But, when Season 3 rolled around, I was there with bells on. My favorite didn't make it to the top three (C.J.), but once the three was revealed, I was pulling for Dale. When Season Four started, I was pulling for Richard Blais from the start. I thought he was great, and loved his adventuresome spirit. JF liked Stephanie, the eventual winner; so we argued the merits of each back and forth all season long.
I will also confess to a guilty pleasure of America's Got Talent, simply because I adore the total train-wreckiness of it. You never know what's going to turn up next on AGT, and there are often some very talented people hidden among the dreck. Unfortunately, there's a lot more dreck than gold, and I'm often totally blown away by how much confidence people have in themselves and their often dubious "talents." For example, a woman got up on stage the other night, claiming that everyone she meets is just astounded and in awe of her talents -- and then she barked at people. It was as freaky as if you'd awoken to realize that you live inside a Salvador Dalí painting.
At any rate, on the Fox network, I noticed a promo clip for an upcoming Reality show called "More to Love", featuring plus-sized women. The tagline screamed that the average American woman is about a size 12/14, and the average female reality show contestant is a size 2. Then the promo showcased lots of clips of the "More to Love" contestants, most of them crying and talking about how much they just want someone to love them how they are. Betcha dollars to donuts that the producers force the ladies to compete in either a) a humiliating eating contest of some sort, or b) a humiliating swimsuit competition. Or maybe both, if there's such a thing as summer ratings week.
I feel a fat rant (and my inner rage) building......
I don't know whether or not I can actually watch this series, knowing that it's most likely just another excuse to "poke fun at the fatties". I would love to hope that it will be a great show that showcases the fact that loveable and beautiful people come in all shapes and sizes and celebrates women who don't happen to fit society's very narrow standard of beauty, but somehow, I don't think it will be. Fox isn't exactly known for taking the high road.
The best I can hope for is that it's not too humiliating for the contestants, and for fat people in general. Most of you know by now how much I do not care for those who warp other people's opinions of themselves, and this seems to me to be a recipe for a whole huge honking slice of the demographic pie who will later need some serious therapy.
I will admit to an unhealthy fixation to Bravo's Top Chef, though I don't really consider that a Reality TV show. I got really into TC late in season 2, so I didn't really have a vested interest in who won. But, when Season 3 rolled around, I was there with bells on. My favorite didn't make it to the top three (C.J.), but once the three was revealed, I was pulling for Dale. When Season Four started, I was pulling for Richard Blais from the start. I thought he was great, and loved his adventuresome spirit. JF liked Stephanie, the eventual winner; so we argued the merits of each back and forth all season long.
I will also confess to a guilty pleasure of America's Got Talent, simply because I adore the total train-wreckiness of it. You never know what's going to turn up next on AGT, and there are often some very talented people hidden among the dreck. Unfortunately, there's a lot more dreck than gold, and I'm often totally blown away by how much confidence people have in themselves and their often dubious "talents." For example, a woman got up on stage the other night, claiming that everyone she meets is just astounded and in awe of her talents -- and then she barked at people. It was as freaky as if you'd awoken to realize that you live inside a Salvador Dalí painting.
At any rate, on the Fox network, I noticed a promo clip for an upcoming Reality show called "More to Love", featuring plus-sized women. The tagline screamed that the average American woman is about a size 12/14, and the average female reality show contestant is a size 2. Then the promo showcased lots of clips of the "More to Love" contestants, most of them crying and talking about how much they just want someone to love them how they are. Betcha dollars to donuts that the producers force the ladies to compete in either a) a humiliating eating contest of some sort, or b) a humiliating swimsuit competition. Or maybe both, if there's such a thing as summer ratings week.
I feel a fat rant (and my inner rage) building......
I don't know whether or not I can actually watch this series, knowing that it's most likely just another excuse to "poke fun at the fatties". I would love to hope that it will be a great show that showcases the fact that loveable and beautiful people come in all shapes and sizes and celebrates women who don't happen to fit society's very narrow standard of beauty, but somehow, I don't think it will be. Fox isn't exactly known for taking the high road.
The best I can hope for is that it's not too humiliating for the contestants, and for fat people in general. Most of you know by now how much I do not care for those who warp other people's opinions of themselves, and this seems to me to be a recipe for a whole huge honking slice of the demographic pie who will later need some serious therapy.
Monday, June 29, 2009
One Down, Nine To Go
Well, week one of classes is finished. I've turned in my first two assignments, and taken the quiz on Unit One. Now, all I have to do is participate in the online discussions, start on Unit Two, and wait for my grades for Unit One to come in.
This class is proving a little harder than I expected. It's an Intro-level class, and I expected it to be a little more about the abstract -- more of an overview, really -- but we've jumped in with both feet. I'm a little out of my depth, as the subject matter is something I'm not familiar with at all. I'm enjoying it, at least when I'm not stressing about getting my assignments in via scanning and uploading and chewing my nails waiting for grades.
Going back to school after almost 20 years is frightening in how same and yet how different it all is. Maybe if I were actually on campus, it might strike me in a different way. Back in my day, "computer skills" consisted of programming, not uploading and file sharing and online text/video chats with your professor.
At any rate, it's nice to be back in school. If you're interested, I will keep all of you posted on what grades I get.
--------------------------------
Edited to add:
First set of grades are in, and I got a 93.34 on Quiz 1, a 100 on Quiz 2, and an 80 on my Unit One project. I'm still waiting on the grade for the classwork from Unit One, but I hope it will be a good one. I'm a bit bummed by the 80, but it's a decent grade, and I have room to improve. The thing about this class is that there's the practical knowledge to learn and the application of said knowledge, and my downfall was not applying all that I've absorbed from the text into applied knowledge. I have to work on that. But, I have to look at it this way -- I can only hope that that 80 is my lowest grade, and go from there. Not a bad start.
This class is proving a little harder than I expected. It's an Intro-level class, and I expected it to be a little more about the abstract -- more of an overview, really -- but we've jumped in with both feet. I'm a little out of my depth, as the subject matter is something I'm not familiar with at all. I'm enjoying it, at least when I'm not stressing about getting my assignments in via scanning and uploading and chewing my nails waiting for grades.
Going back to school after almost 20 years is frightening in how same and yet how different it all is. Maybe if I were actually on campus, it might strike me in a different way. Back in my day, "computer skills" consisted of programming, not uploading and file sharing and online text/video chats with your professor.
At any rate, it's nice to be back in school. If you're interested, I will keep all of you posted on what grades I get.
--------------------------------
Edited to add:
First set of grades are in, and I got a 93.34 on Quiz 1, a 100 on Quiz 2, and an 80 on my Unit One project. I'm still waiting on the grade for the classwork from Unit One, but I hope it will be a good one. I'm a bit bummed by the 80, but it's a decent grade, and I have room to improve. The thing about this class is that there's the practical knowledge to learn and the application of said knowledge, and my downfall was not applying all that I've absorbed from the text into applied knowledge. I have to work on that. But, I have to look at it this way -- I can only hope that that 80 is my lowest grade, and go from there. Not a bad start.
Saturday, June 20, 2009
What In Hell Made Me Think I Could Do This?!?!
School (college) starts on Monday. I have spent the latter part of this week getting ready for the start of Summer Term. School (elementary school) ended on Wednesday, and since then, I have had to focus away from my full-time job, and onto my soon-to-be-starting school (college.)
Yesterday, I had to go downtown to the main administrative building to get my student ID, even though I will be taking an online class. The reason that I went ahead and got the student ID was so that I could get into various buildings, should I need them, like the library, and the student center. I also took my husband to lunch, and then we went to pick up my textbooks and some of the supplies. My God, I had forgotten how freaking expensive college is! Thank God I had some of the necessary supplies here at home, or I'd be in deep doo-doo.
This morning, I finished up my online orientation, and the requisite assignments that that entailed, and printed out the 10-week syllabus. I looked over the first lesson, and went ahead and read the first 3 chapters in the textbook. My overwhelming thought now, is "what in hell have you gotten yourself into? Don't you know you're pushing 40? It's not like you're a coed who can cram all night and still function like a living human being during class during the day!" A good bet for your entertainment for the next 10 weeks would be to stay tuned and watch me self-flagellate daily. That, or spontaneously combust. Oy.
Yesterday, I had to go downtown to the main administrative building to get my student ID, even though I will be taking an online class. The reason that I went ahead and got the student ID was so that I could get into various buildings, should I need them, like the library, and the student center. I also took my husband to lunch, and then we went to pick up my textbooks and some of the supplies. My God, I had forgotten how freaking expensive college is! Thank God I had some of the necessary supplies here at home, or I'd be in deep doo-doo.
This morning, I finished up my online orientation, and the requisite assignments that that entailed, and printed out the 10-week syllabus. I looked over the first lesson, and went ahead and read the first 3 chapters in the textbook. My overwhelming thought now, is "what in hell have you gotten yourself into? Don't you know you're pushing 40? It's not like you're a coed who can cram all night and still function like a living human being during class during the day!" A good bet for your entertainment for the next 10 weeks would be to stay tuned and watch me self-flagellate daily. That, or spontaneously combust. Oy.
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Whine/Anti-Whine
Some of you lovely people read the Wednesday Whine, a sort of blog-Brigadoon that I've been involved with for quite a while. Some of you are not familiar with the concept, so I'll (briefly) explain:
A long time ago, a delightful bloggy friend named Phantom Scribbler hosted a weekly bitch-fest at her personal blog. It was a place where friends could complain and commiserate with each other over the joys and flops in their lives. It became a task too heavy for lovely PS, who allowed a collection of moderators to take over the idea and give it its own home. WW, as it is familiarly known, has been a great community, and I've greatly enjoyed taking part in it.
But, since I am colossally lazy, I have decided to repost here my submission for the WW, and this will keep all of you three dear readers updated on what's going on here at Chez KLee. Here follows my tale, told in whine/anti-whine format.
--------------------------------------------------
W: I'm in a bad bad BAD situation at work. It hasn't been very much fun for several weeks. Tensions are high, and with only 2 days of school left, we're all testy and short tempered. But, most of the bad bad BAD situation makes me look bad to everyone else, even if that isn't actually the facts.
A/W: Got accepted back to school, so that mitigates some of the bad bad BAD stuff. I'm excited about it. It will allow me to mark off one of those things on my major "To Do" life lists.
W: Was supposed to have a scholarship to cover cost of tuition for Summer Term at said school, only to find a bill for almost 3K (that I seriously DON'T have) in the mail today. Uh.....guys?!? Hello?
A/W: If I am still going to school, it'll get my mom off my back. Plus, President Obama is urging people to further their education in times of economic crisis, so it's almost like I'm *helping!*
W: Am still sick. Not as sick as I was about a month ago, thank God. But, still sick. And, apparently, I now have high cholesterol, too. Thanks for that! Sickness involved almost accidentally overdosing on migraine drugs the other day, and a cyst on my neck that will have to be cut out at some point. Trying to save the day surgery for after school is done so I don't have to work or move during the recovery process.
A/W: At least I DIDN'T overdose, though I had double vision and serious nausea. And, I gotta figure that every day I'm not taking the Great Dirt Nap is a good day. So, yeah -- I'll count being alive among the anti-whines these days.
A long time ago, a delightful bloggy friend named Phantom Scribbler hosted a weekly bitch-fest at her personal blog. It was a place where friends could complain and commiserate with each other over the joys and flops in their lives. It became a task too heavy for lovely PS, who allowed a collection of moderators to take over the idea and give it its own home. WW, as it is familiarly known, has been a great community, and I've greatly enjoyed taking part in it.
But, since I am colossally lazy, I have decided to repost here my submission for the WW, and this will keep all of you three dear readers updated on what's going on here at Chez KLee. Here follows my tale, told in whine/anti-whine format.
--------------------------------------------------
W: I'm in a bad bad BAD situation at work. It hasn't been very much fun for several weeks. Tensions are high, and with only 2 days of school left, we're all testy and short tempered. But, most of the bad bad BAD situation makes me look bad to everyone else, even if that isn't actually the facts.
A/W: Got accepted back to school, so that mitigates some of the bad bad BAD stuff. I'm excited about it. It will allow me to mark off one of those things on my major "To Do" life lists.
W: Was supposed to have a scholarship to cover cost of tuition for Summer Term at said school, only to find a bill for almost 3K (that I seriously DON'T have) in the mail today. Uh.....guys?!? Hello?
A/W: If I am still going to school, it'll get my mom off my back. Plus, President Obama is urging people to further their education in times of economic crisis, so it's almost like I'm *helping!*
W: Am still sick. Not as sick as I was about a month ago, thank God. But, still sick. And, apparently, I now have high cholesterol, too. Thanks for that! Sickness involved almost accidentally overdosing on migraine drugs the other day, and a cyst on my neck that will have to be cut out at some point. Trying to save the day surgery for after school is done so I don't have to work or move during the recovery process.
A/W: At least I DIDN'T overdose, though I had double vision and serious nausea. And, I gotta figure that every day I'm not taking the Great Dirt Nap is a good day. So, yeah -- I'll count being alive among the anti-whines these days.
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Maintaining Radio Silence
Never fear, my faithful three readers -- I have not gone gentle into that good night. (When I go, there won't be anything *gentle* about it. I plan to go, kicking and screaming.)
I have been very busy, as the end of all school years tend to be.
*We are winding up all of our end-of-the-year testing, and trying to tie up all the loose ends for the children who most likely won't be matriculating on to first grade. This is also usually the time where we have many visits from irate parents who want to harangue us, even though we've been telling them the same basic information since the first marking period. What do they expect when they don't bother to help their child(ren) with their school work? How can they say they're really surprised that little Johnny is failing kindergarten when we can't even get you to bring him to school every day, much less with pencils and crayons; and nevermind with completed homework? Anyway...it's the same song, every year.
*Offspring is going to be a rising eighth-grader, and with that comes the rush to get her portfolio together so she can audition for the Arts school here in town in the winter for a entering freshman for the following year. We are pushing hard at her to really work on her artwork, but I don't think it's sinking in on her. I really want her to get in this school -- it's fabulous academically, and the potential for her personal growth there would be incredible. The options left open to us if she's NOT accepted I don't even want to fathom.
*Speaking of school -- I have applied to go back to school myself. More on that as it develops, but that's in the extreme infancy stage right now. Haven't even been accepted, but hopefully that's nothing major to worry over.
*I often joke about living in the tropics, but my joke was made real today by the monsoon JF and I experienced as we went out to do the grocery shopping. We headed out to Sam's, and by the time we got there, the water was coming down so hard you could barely see, there was hail the size of Tic Tacs, and the wind was blowing us around like a candy wrapper in an updraft. JF clambered over the backseat like a monkey to get the big golf umbrella for me while he took the teeny collapsible one. We might as well have not even used the blasted brollies for all the good they did us! We were soaked to the skin within minutes, the the wind turned my heavy umbrella into kinetic sculpture. Funnily enough, the small umbrella survived unscathed. The employees at Sam's got a hearty giggle out of our drowned-rat appearance, and they even made a sale with the strategically-placed beach towels at the front entrance. JF snickered endlessly at the fact the umbrellas did nothing to help us, and wandered around muttering about "great big old fat rain."
*We had a Girl Scout appreciation dinner the other night for the leaders in our local unit, and the decision was made to hold it at our local Carrabba's. Now, I'm not a fan of Carrabba's, and I wouldn't have gone except for the fact that it was our end-of-the-year, hand out all the certificates of appreciation type of thing. Our Service Unit Manager called three weeks ahead of time, and reserved their back room so that our large party would not disturb any of the other patrons. She called back the day before our gathering to confirm. Everyting seemed fine -- they had us down for 35 people at 7pm. I was the first to arrive the next evening, at 6:30, in order to do a little bit of decorating on the tables. I was told they were getting our tables together. When the others arrived, they tried to direct us to tables in the middle of the restaurant. They'd given the tables in the back room away. To two people. We asked to speak with the manager. He refused to asked them to move, or to help us in any way. We explained that we'd had that room reserved for over 3 weeks, and we'd asked for that room SPECIFICALLY because we'd be making presentations, and getting up and down a lot, and we didn't want to disturb other diners. He still refused to give us the room. We were on the brink of walking; 25 irate PAYING customers; when one of our ladies sweet-talks him into shooing the parties in the back room out of there as quickly as he can without being ugly AND free desserts for all of us. As we're shown to the table, the hostess is as rude as she can possibly be to me. I would have been happier anywhere else. I will NEVER go to Carrabba's again. I sense an angry letter in my future.
That's pretty much all that's going on here. Offspring took a Girl Scout trip to Orlando this weekend, so I'm just waiting for the call that her bus is trundling up the turnpike, and I should hie my fanny up to the meeting place to fetch her. Stay alive out there, people!
I have been very busy, as the end of all school years tend to be.
*We are winding up all of our end-of-the-year testing, and trying to tie up all the loose ends for the children who most likely won't be matriculating on to first grade. This is also usually the time where we have many visits from irate parents who want to harangue us, even though we've been telling them the same basic information since the first marking period. What do they expect when they don't bother to help their child(ren) with their school work? How can they say they're really surprised that little Johnny is failing kindergarten when we can't even get you to bring him to school every day, much less with pencils and crayons; and nevermind with completed homework? Anyway...it's the same song, every year.
*Offspring is going to be a rising eighth-grader, and with that comes the rush to get her portfolio together so she can audition for the Arts school here in town in the winter for a entering freshman for the following year. We are pushing hard at her to really work on her artwork, but I don't think it's sinking in on her. I really want her to get in this school -- it's fabulous academically, and the potential for her personal growth there would be incredible. The options left open to us if she's NOT accepted I don't even want to fathom.
*Speaking of school -- I have applied to go back to school myself. More on that as it develops, but that's in the extreme infancy stage right now. Haven't even been accepted, but hopefully that's nothing major to worry over.
*I often joke about living in the tropics, but my joke was made real today by the monsoon JF and I experienced as we went out to do the grocery shopping. We headed out to Sam's, and by the time we got there, the water was coming down so hard you could barely see, there was hail the size of Tic Tacs, and the wind was blowing us around like a candy wrapper in an updraft. JF clambered over the backseat like a monkey to get the big golf umbrella for me while he took the teeny collapsible one. We might as well have not even used the blasted brollies for all the good they did us! We were soaked to the skin within minutes, the the wind turned my heavy umbrella into kinetic sculpture. Funnily enough, the small umbrella survived unscathed. The employees at Sam's got a hearty giggle out of our drowned-rat appearance, and they even made a sale with the strategically-placed beach towels at the front entrance. JF snickered endlessly at the fact the umbrellas did nothing to help us, and wandered around muttering about "great big old fat rain."
*We had a Girl Scout appreciation dinner the other night for the leaders in our local unit, and the decision was made to hold it at our local Carrabba's. Now, I'm not a fan of Carrabba's, and I wouldn't have gone except for the fact that it was our end-of-the-year, hand out all the certificates of appreciation type of thing. Our Service Unit Manager called three weeks ahead of time, and reserved their back room so that our large party would not disturb any of the other patrons. She called back the day before our gathering to confirm. Everyting seemed fine -- they had us down for 35 people at 7pm. I was the first to arrive the next evening, at 6:30, in order to do a little bit of decorating on the tables. I was told they were getting our tables together. When the others arrived, they tried to direct us to tables in the middle of the restaurant. They'd given the tables in the back room away. To two people. We asked to speak with the manager. He refused to asked them to move, or to help us in any way. We explained that we'd had that room reserved for over 3 weeks, and we'd asked for that room SPECIFICALLY because we'd be making presentations, and getting up and down a lot, and we didn't want to disturb other diners. He still refused to give us the room. We were on the brink of walking; 25 irate PAYING customers; when one of our ladies sweet-talks him into shooing the parties in the back room out of there as quickly as he can without being ugly AND free desserts for all of us. As we're shown to the table, the hostess is as rude as she can possibly be to me. I would have been happier anywhere else. I will NEVER go to Carrabba's again. I sense an angry letter in my future.
That's pretty much all that's going on here. Offspring took a Girl Scout trip to Orlando this weekend, so I'm just waiting for the call that her bus is trundling up the turnpike, and I should hie my fanny up to the meeting place to fetch her. Stay alive out there, people!
Wednesday, May 06, 2009
Sick
I woke up this morning at 4:14am to a raging migraine. While this was distressing, the worst of it is that I had just been to the doctor on Monday to complain about headache pain. I've been having a low-grade chronic headache for about a month, which scares the bejeezus out of me.
The doc has me taking what is actually an anti-seizure medication, but which has been used successfully to minimize migraine symptoms and severity. I've been taking the meds for 2 days now. Not even hardly enough time to get into the bloodstream, much less do me any good.
So, the migraine this morning. It was bad. Really bad. Contemplating going-to-the-hospital sort of bad. I took meds, which didn't help, and I vomited for about three hours straight. Now my throat is raw, and my whole body hurts from heaving.
I called in sick to work, which I'm *sure* earned me brownie points because we are currently undergoing standardized testing, and need every available body. Never mind the fact that I couldn't even function until early this afternoon, much less work and help administer an exam.
I hate being sick. I hate migraines.
The doc has me taking what is actually an anti-seizure medication, but which has been used successfully to minimize migraine symptoms and severity. I've been taking the meds for 2 days now. Not even hardly enough time to get into the bloodstream, much less do me any good.
So, the migraine this morning. It was bad. Really bad. Contemplating going-to-the-hospital sort of bad. I took meds, which didn't help, and I vomited for about three hours straight. Now my throat is raw, and my whole body hurts from heaving.
I called in sick to work, which I'm *sure* earned me brownie points because we are currently undergoing standardized testing, and need every available body. Never mind the fact that I couldn't even function until early this afternoon, much less work and help administer an exam.
I hate being sick. I hate migraines.
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Switching Teams
I just read the amazing news that Senator Arlen Specter has switched his allegiance from the Republican to the Democratic party. His reasons for the move, he says, were due to increasing disagreement with viewpoints within his own party. Specter also said that he thought he would find it hard to be reelected, what with all the conservatives that are making up the Republican party these days.
What I find most stunning of all, though, was the quote from Republican Senate Party Leader Mitch McConnell. His opinion on the matter? He said, "... the switch posed a 'threat to the country', and "really relates to ... whether or not in the United States of America our people want the majority party to have whatever it wants, without restraint, without a check or balance."
Huh? You mean like what America has suffered under Bush for the last eight years? Including a war that's killing thousands of American lives and costing a mint -- the war that no one WANTS, and that most of the rest of the world's nations condemn us for? Or, maybe you meant floating asinine home loans to every Tom, Dick, and under-qualified Harry in the lower 48? The loans that caused our economy to go "BOOM!" and necessitate an astronomical bailout so company bigwigs can keep their golden parachutes while John Q. Public and his family try to make ends meet with less and just PRAY they don't get sick because they no longer have any health insurance? Man, that would just suck, wouldn't it?
-----------------------------
You know, generally, I'm not a political person. I tend to think most politicians are a bunch of snake-oil salesmen. But, I think we Americans suffered a lot under the tenure of the last eight years' administration, and I'm praying we can paper-clip, rubber band, and chewing gum our proud nation back together. I hold no ill will towards anyone who might be of a Republican bent, or any other persuasion. I have Republican friends and family members who feel very much in the minority these days. It's not so much about dissing you Republicans, and your core values, because most "more liberal" people have them, too. But, it IS time for another generation to have a shot at running the whole ball of wax. And it's okay that it's not just another WASP-y white guy whom most of the nation feels disenfranchised with. We need someone who believes that it's okay if gay people want to be married, or to provide health care for those who are sorely in need of it. Someone who helps pull our economy out of the toilet. Someone who understands that taxing the poor people the MOST, while taxing the wealthy the LEAST make *no sense whatsover.* Someone who can make America a good friend at the world's table again. We certainly need it.
What I find most stunning of all, though, was the quote from Republican Senate Party Leader Mitch McConnell. His opinion on the matter? He said, "... the switch posed a 'threat to the country', and "really relates to ... whether or not in the United States of America our people want the majority party to have whatever it wants, without restraint, without a check or balance."
Huh? You mean like what America has suffered under Bush for the last eight years? Including a war that's killing thousands of American lives and costing a mint -- the war that no one WANTS, and that most of the rest of the world's nations condemn us for? Or, maybe you meant floating asinine home loans to every Tom, Dick, and under-qualified Harry in the lower 48? The loans that caused our economy to go "BOOM!" and necessitate an astronomical bailout so company bigwigs can keep their golden parachutes while John Q. Public and his family try to make ends meet with less and just PRAY they don't get sick because they no longer have any health insurance? Man, that would just suck, wouldn't it?
-----------------------------
You know, generally, I'm not a political person. I tend to think most politicians are a bunch of snake-oil salesmen. But, I think we Americans suffered a lot under the tenure of the last eight years' administration, and I'm praying we can paper-clip, rubber band, and chewing gum our proud nation back together. I hold no ill will towards anyone who might be of a Republican bent, or any other persuasion. I have Republican friends and family members who feel very much in the minority these days. It's not so much about dissing you Republicans, and your core values, because most "more liberal" people have them, too. But, it IS time for another generation to have a shot at running the whole ball of wax. And it's okay that it's not just another WASP-y white guy whom most of the nation feels disenfranchised with. We need someone who believes that it's okay if gay people want to be married, or to provide health care for those who are sorely in need of it. Someone who helps pull our economy out of the toilet. Someone who understands that taxing the poor people the MOST, while taxing the wealthy the LEAST make *no sense whatsover.* Someone who can make America a good friend at the world's table again. We certainly need it.
Monday, April 20, 2009
Please Don't Share Your Germs
Offspring stayed home from school today, citing fever and nausea as the main reasons. After JF and I thoroughly grilled her about what, exactly, it was she was wanting to miss at school today, I gave in and took a sick day to be with her.
We have left her home by herself for a full day on VERY rare occasions, figuring that I was only three and a half minutes away through traffic, but leaving her home alone didn't seem like a good idea today. We had storms in the area, and coupled with the fact that I felt pretty sure that she would spend the bulk of the day on the couch playing the Wii and 360 and do no ACTUAL resting, I stayed home, too. Mainly to prevent said brain drainage on the video game front.
Offspring has a very bad habit of spiking fevers into the 103 - 105 range with very little effort, so I wanted to be home in case this was what was happening with her.
The fever lingered in a low-grade state all day, but apparently the nausea has gone bye-bye, since she ate both lunch and dinner with no difficulties.
I began feeling a little yucky about 30 minutes ago, and now have a very seasick-feeling stomach. I hope I don't have whatever she had. I hate it when she shares the bad stuff! Why couldn't she have just given me her wallet? Or her carton of Ben and Jerry's Cake Batter that was in the freezer? Why did she have to share the nausea?
We have left her home by herself for a full day on VERY rare occasions, figuring that I was only three and a half minutes away through traffic, but leaving her home alone didn't seem like a good idea today. We had storms in the area, and coupled with the fact that I felt pretty sure that she would spend the bulk of the day on the couch playing the Wii and 360 and do no ACTUAL resting, I stayed home, too. Mainly to prevent said brain drainage on the video game front.
Offspring has a very bad habit of spiking fevers into the 103 - 105 range with very little effort, so I wanted to be home in case this was what was happening with her.
The fever lingered in a low-grade state all day, but apparently the nausea has gone bye-bye, since she ate both lunch and dinner with no difficulties.
I began feeling a little yucky about 30 minutes ago, and now have a very seasick-feeling stomach. I hope I don't have whatever she had. I hate it when she shares the bad stuff! Why couldn't she have just given me her wallet? Or her carton of Ben and Jerry's Cake Batter that was in the freezer? Why did she have to share the nausea?
Sunday, April 12, 2009
I Sang To A Goat In Your Bathroom Because I'm AWESOME!
>This is an interesting meme that went around my school's email. Follow the directions to compose your sentence, and post your version in comments, if you would so kindly oblige me! Have fun!
The title sentence is mine, obviously...
Pick the month you were born:
January-------I kicked
February------I loved
March--------I karate chopped
April----------I licked
May----------I jumped on
June----------I smelled
July-----------I did the Macarena with
August--------I had lunch with
September----I danced with
October-------I sang to
November-----I yelled at
December-----I ran over
Pick the day (number) you were born on:
1-------a birdbath
2-------a monster
3-------a phone
4-------a fork
5-------a snowman
6-------a gangster
7-------my mobile phone
8-------my dog
9-------my best friends' boyfriend
10-------my neighbor
11-------my science teacher
12-------a banana
13-------a fireman
14-------a stuffed animal
15-------a goat
16-------a pickle
17-------your mom
18-------a spoon
19------ - a smurf
20-------a baseball bat
21-------a ninja
22-------Chuck Norris
23-------a noodle
24-------a squirrel
25-------a football player
26-------my sister
27-------my brother
28-------an iPod
29-------a surfer
30-------a homeless guy
31-------a llama
What is the last number of the year you were born:
1--------- in my car
2 --------- on your car
3 ----------- in a hole
4 ----------- under your bed
5 ----------- riding a Motorcycle
6 --------- sliding down a hill
7 --------- in an elevator
8---------- at the dinner table
9 -------- in line at the bank
0 -------- in your bathroom
Pick the color of shirt you are wearing:
White---------because I'm cool like that.
Black---------because that's how I roll.
Pink-----------because I'm NOT crazy.
Red-----------because the voices told me to.
Blue-----------because I'm sexy and I do what I want!
Green---------because I think I need some serious help.
Purple---------because I'm AWESOME!
Gray----------because Big Bird said to and he's my leader.
Yellow--------because someone offered me 1,000,000 dollars.
Brown---------because I can.
Other----------because I'm a Ninja!
None----------because I can't control myself!
Friday, April 10, 2009
Still Here, Still Got Nothin' to Contribute
I am here, having driven five states away from home -- a round trip of 1300+ miles in three days. My daughter's Girl Scout troop went snow skiing, and I accompanied them as a driver/chaperone. It was a nice trip, but it was fast. And, I mean commando-raid style fast.
Offspring skiied for about 12 minutes all total, which cheesed me off quite a bit. Then, on our last day there, 5 separate people in our party got injured within the space of a half an hour, and I wasn't quite so cheesed off anymore. I was glad that Offspring hadn't taken to skiing and wasn't one of the ones who took a tumble. Still a mite peeved that we drove all that way, and paid about $300 for the trip all told for her NOT to ski, but since I had basically the same attitude (bust my butt in the freezing snow? No thank you!) at her age, I won't squawk too loudly.
We are on Spring Break, with only the weekend left to go. Boo! I need at least another week! :) Hope all is well with all of you!
Offspring skiied for about 12 minutes all total, which cheesed me off quite a bit. Then, on our last day there, 5 separate people in our party got injured within the space of a half an hour, and I wasn't quite so cheesed off anymore. I was glad that Offspring hadn't taken to skiing and wasn't one of the ones who took a tumble. Still a mite peeved that we drove all that way, and paid about $300 for the trip all told for her NOT to ski, but since I had basically the same attitude (bust my butt in the freezing snow? No thank you!) at her age, I won't squawk too loudly.
We are on Spring Break, with only the weekend left to go. Boo! I need at least another week! :) Hope all is well with all of you!
Friday, March 27, 2009
The Three B's
The first of the three B's was: Baltimore. I just traveled there for a work conference, which was great. I had never been that far north before, and I was looking forward to the trip, not only for the educational information that I was going to get out of it, but also for the complete change of scenery. Last year's conference was in Washington, D.C., and that was the farthest north I'd been up until that point.
JF was worried about me being in the Big City, so he told me not to go wandering around after dark, and to try not to walk anywhere alone. Knowing that Baltimore has some...um...*healthy* crime stats, I agreed. Plus, I've been held up before, and it's not a scene I care to repeat ever again.
As a fan of the late, great, and much-lamented TV show "Homicide: Life on the Street", I was curious to experience Baltimore for myself. I wanted to get a chance to take a picture on the station house steps, but, alas, that was not to be. We just didn't have enough down-time. It would have required a bit of a taxi drive, or a jaunt by Water Taxi, and it wasn't in the cards this trip. Maybe one day I'll be able to return, and that will be a must-see. Plus, I was under orders not to go alone, and truthfully, I didn't want to go all over Baltimore by myself anyway.
Our hotel was right next door to Camden Yards. I was surprised to see Camden Yards smack in the middle of downtown. Usually, the ball fields/stadiums are on the outskirts of town. My room was on the other side of the hotel, but some of the people in our group had great views down into the park. If only there had been a game.
The second B was: Binsk, as in La Binsk, an internet friend from waaay back. We were both denizens of a newsgroup devoted to the previously mentioned "Homicide", and have been friends for what seemed like forever, but without any chance to ever actually meet up. This trip provided us with a good reason! We made plans to grab a bite to eat down at the Inner Harbor, which was only a few blocks from our hotel and conference site.
Binsk brought her mother along, and we all had a lovely dinner at the Cheesecake Factory. It was great to finally meet her, and her mother was a true hoot. Unfortunately, they had to leave early the next morning to drive to Oklahoma so time was of the essence. If Binsk gives her permission, I will upload the photo of the two of us.
I arrived early, a few minutes before Binsk and Mom did, so I stepped out of the back door to check out what the Inner Harbor had to offer. I turned to the left, and saw the beautiful National Aquarium, so I took a picture.
When I turned to the right, there was the U.S.S. Constellation and the Constellation Museum. JF loves sailing ships, so I figured that I would take a picture of museum AND ship for him. I raise my camera to my eye, and I hear a strident voice say. "Ma'am? Ma'am! I need you to NOT do that!" I lower the camera, and realize that there's a security guard talking to me. I said back to him, in a very confused manner, "Um...I'm not taking a picture of YOU, I'm taking a picture of the *museum.*" He says, "I need you to not do that right now."
As I look around, Ol Eagle Eye me realizes that there are quite a few security guards about, and that though this is obviously a pedestrian area, no one's walking through. We're all milling about on the steps. At the end of the walkway, there are sawhorses, preventing the pedestrian traffic. (I'm a quick one!) In front of me, there's a small dock area where there are plenty of paddle boats available for rent. Only, strangely enough -- none are rented out. With this many people hanging around, you think they'd have some business. Hm. Odd.
After a minute, a man steps out of the dock house, and he's carrying a long hook on a pole. It looks like a fireplace poker with a really long handle. As we (the crowd and I) watch, the guy goes over to the corner of the harbor and begins poking around with the pole in the water. After a few minutes, he snags something, and begins laboriously tugging it over towards the dock.
Updated to add: Binsk approved my adding the picture of the two of us, so find it above!
Right about now is when I noticed the news helicopters hovering around. (Nothing gets past me, I tell ya!)
The hook man finally tugs his burden into somewhat of a viewable area. And.....that brings us to our last B: the body in the harbor. As fond as I am of police procedurals and forensic shows, all I had to see was a wet mop of hair to know that I was out of there. I bolted for the restaurant. Maybe my choice of pasta for dinner wasn't the best course of action, now that I think about it.
I called JF later that night to tell him about my first day. When I get to the part about the body, he had the same reaction that I did -- "Welcome to Baltimore!" Later in the trip, we encountered a homeless man in McDonald's who managed to talk the entire 20 or so minutes that we were there without seeming to take a breath. The day after the nonstop talker, we encountered a junkie in full-nod passout mode who was still managing to stand, by some miracle of gravity. She tottered in the doorway, and had occasional bouts of lucidity before she'd appear to pass out again. At one point, she pulled out a cigarette and stuck it between her lips before succumbing again. After a few minutes, she pulled out a lighter. I nudged my companion and told her that I'd pay her ten bucks if Junkie Lady lit her own hair on fire. Unfortunately, I have no idea if Junkie Lady survived unroasted because she left shortly afterward.
All in all, it was an eventful trip. The train ride was long and mostly uncomfortable, but it was an experience. I hope one day to return to Baltimore, despite all the colorful characters we encountered. Maybe the next time, I will have more time to explore.
JF was worried about me being in the Big City, so he told me not to go wandering around after dark, and to try not to walk anywhere alone. Knowing that Baltimore has some...um...*healthy* crime stats, I agreed. Plus, I've been held up before, and it's not a scene I care to repeat ever again.
As a fan of the late, great, and much-lamented TV show "Homicide: Life on the Street", I was curious to experience Baltimore for myself. I wanted to get a chance to take a picture on the station house steps, but, alas, that was not to be. We just didn't have enough down-time. It would have required a bit of a taxi drive, or a jaunt by Water Taxi, and it wasn't in the cards this trip. Maybe one day I'll be able to return, and that will be a must-see. Plus, I was under orders not to go alone, and truthfully, I didn't want to go all over Baltimore by myself anyway.
Our hotel was right next door to Camden Yards. I was surprised to see Camden Yards smack in the middle of downtown. Usually, the ball fields/stadiums are on the outskirts of town. My room was on the other side of the hotel, but some of the people in our group had great views down into the park. If only there had been a game.
The second B was: Binsk, as in La Binsk, an internet friend from waaay back. We were both denizens of a newsgroup devoted to the previously mentioned "Homicide", and have been friends for what seemed like forever, but without any chance to ever actually meet up. This trip provided us with a good reason! We made plans to grab a bite to eat down at the Inner Harbor, which was only a few blocks from our hotel and conference site.
Binsk brought her mother along, and we all had a lovely dinner at the Cheesecake Factory. It was great to finally meet her, and her mother was a true hoot. Unfortunately, they had to leave early the next morning to drive to Oklahoma so time was of the essence. If Binsk gives her permission, I will upload the photo of the two of us.
I arrived early, a few minutes before Binsk and Mom did, so I stepped out of the back door to check out what the Inner Harbor had to offer. I turned to the left, and saw the beautiful National Aquarium, so I took a picture.
When I turned to the right, there was the U.S.S. Constellation and the Constellation Museum. JF loves sailing ships, so I figured that I would take a picture of museum AND ship for him. I raise my camera to my eye, and I hear a strident voice say. "Ma'am? Ma'am! I need you to NOT do that!" I lower the camera, and realize that there's a security guard talking to me. I said back to him, in a very confused manner, "Um...I'm not taking a picture of YOU, I'm taking a picture of the *museum.*" He says, "I need you to not do that right now."
As I look around, Ol Eagle Eye me realizes that there are quite a few security guards about, and that though this is obviously a pedestrian area, no one's walking through. We're all milling about on the steps. At the end of the walkway, there are sawhorses, preventing the pedestrian traffic. (I'm a quick one!) In front of me, there's a small dock area where there are plenty of paddle boats available for rent. Only, strangely enough -- none are rented out. With this many people hanging around, you think they'd have some business. Hm. Odd.
After a minute, a man steps out of the dock house, and he's carrying a long hook on a pole. It looks like a fireplace poker with a really long handle. As we (the crowd and I) watch, the guy goes over to the corner of the harbor and begins poking around with the pole in the water. After a few minutes, he snags something, and begins laboriously tugging it over towards the dock.
Updated to add: Binsk approved my adding the picture of the two of us, so find it above!
Right about now is when I noticed the news helicopters hovering around. (Nothing gets past me, I tell ya!)
The hook man finally tugs his burden into somewhat of a viewable area. And.....that brings us to our last B: the body in the harbor. As fond as I am of police procedurals and forensic shows, all I had to see was a wet mop of hair to know that I was out of there. I bolted for the restaurant. Maybe my choice of pasta for dinner wasn't the best course of action, now that I think about it.
I called JF later that night to tell him about my first day. When I get to the part about the body, he had the same reaction that I did -- "Welcome to Baltimore!" Later in the trip, we encountered a homeless man in McDonald's who managed to talk the entire 20 or so minutes that we were there without seeming to take a breath. The day after the nonstop talker, we encountered a junkie in full-nod passout mode who was still managing to stand, by some miracle of gravity. She tottered in the doorway, and had occasional bouts of lucidity before she'd appear to pass out again. At one point, she pulled out a cigarette and stuck it between her lips before succumbing again. After a few minutes, she pulled out a lighter. I nudged my companion and told her that I'd pay her ten bucks if Junkie Lady lit her own hair on fire. Unfortunately, I have no idea if Junkie Lady survived unroasted because she left shortly afterward.
All in all, it was an eventful trip. The train ride was long and mostly uncomfortable, but it was an experience. I hope one day to return to Baltimore, despite all the colorful characters we encountered. Maybe the next time, I will have more time to explore.
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
On The Road Again
...or, more accurately, on the tracks again! I'm off this evening to catch my train to Baltimore. I hope to get some "fun" time in among all the "professional learning" time, but I'm not sure how much opportunity to do so I will have.
I plan on taking pictures, and hopefully, some of them will be interesting enough to share!
I'll be gone until Monday, so hold down the fort until then, okay?
I plan on taking pictures, and hopefully, some of them will be interesting enough to share!
I'll be gone until Monday, so hold down the fort until then, okay?
Monday, March 09, 2009
Burnt Out
....or rather, the fire in my throat has burnt out. I, myself, have been feeling burnt out for a while. The latest development in the illness saga is that while my throat no longer feels as if it lost a fight with a packet of razor blades followed by a lemon juice chaser, it had mysteriously gone on strike.
I woke up this morning tired (thanks, Daylight Savings Time!) but feeling much better overall. There was some minor hacking in the shower as the hot water loosened my chest up, but my first clue that Something Was Not Right was in the car on the way to work. I've been blasting the most recent Evanescence album for about a month now, and trilling along with Amy Lee. Imagine my surprise when my usual soprano voice did a fairly convincing "Alvin and the Chipmunks" impersonation.
It was decidedly off to realize that I was about to head into a classroom with 16 rambunctious charges with no voice to speak of. I relied a lot on pseudo-sign language today, coupled with a lot of "come close so I can whisper to you" gestures. There was a lot of pointing, and a lot of raised eyebrows as well. I'll let you all imagine how swimmingly my day went. Go ahead -- imagine. I'll wait. Okay. Got a picture in your head? Now, instead superimpose that image with one of the mushroom clouds after the nuclear tests on Bikini Atoll, and you're just about there.
To cap the night off, Offspring gets a frantic text message from a school friend that the super duper, miss-the-WHOLE-day-of-school field trip she's been DYING to go on only has about 13 slots left. She panics, and thrusts the phone at me to call the travel agent in order to secure one of those last seats. Of course, they are closed for the day. OF COURSE. My life wouldn't have it any other way. I leave a very squeaky voice mail for the agent, and hope like hell they can decipher it.
And, in keeping with the "Once again, the Devil farts in my face" tradition, the very minute I am off the phone, Offspring bursts into the room, saying that the message that she got from her friend was "just a joke." Well, of course it was! AND I get to pony up $116 for the privilege, too!
Granted, the trip is an educational one, and one that I'd like to go on, if given the chance. (They're going to see the King Tut exhibit and the Terracotta Army in Atlanta.) I can't go however, because of this pesky thing called work, and because we will be leaving not even 24 hours later on a Girl Scout trip to go snow-skiing. Don't worry, I'm not taking the ankle biters -- this trip is Offspring's troop. We'll be driving to West Virginia, so I will need plenty of rest beforehand. Which means no back-to-back trips for good old Mom. Poor old Dad won't be going on EITHER trip. He'd have to bunk with a bunch of Boy Scouts he doesn't know for the skiing trip, and he's not exactly what one would call a social animal.
So, I'm off to bed in hopes that my voice will return as mysteriously as it left. If not, I have another day of pointing and gesturing ahead. What fun!
I woke up this morning tired (thanks, Daylight Savings Time!) but feeling much better overall. There was some minor hacking in the shower as the hot water loosened my chest up, but my first clue that Something Was Not Right was in the car on the way to work. I've been blasting the most recent Evanescence album for about a month now, and trilling along with Amy Lee. Imagine my surprise when my usual soprano voice did a fairly convincing "Alvin and the Chipmunks" impersonation.
It was decidedly off to realize that I was about to head into a classroom with 16 rambunctious charges with no voice to speak of. I relied a lot on pseudo-sign language today, coupled with a lot of "come close so I can whisper to you" gestures. There was a lot of pointing, and a lot of raised eyebrows as well. I'll let you all imagine how swimmingly my day went. Go ahead -- imagine. I'll wait. Okay. Got a picture in your head? Now, instead superimpose that image with one of the mushroom clouds after the nuclear tests on Bikini Atoll, and you're just about there.
To cap the night off, Offspring gets a frantic text message from a school friend that the super duper, miss-the-WHOLE-day-of-school field trip she's been DYING to go on only has about 13 slots left. She panics, and thrusts the phone at me to call the travel agent in order to secure one of those last seats. Of course, they are closed for the day. OF COURSE. My life wouldn't have it any other way. I leave a very squeaky voice mail for the agent, and hope like hell they can decipher it.
And, in keeping with the "Once again, the Devil farts in my face" tradition, the very minute I am off the phone, Offspring bursts into the room, saying that the message that she got from her friend was "just a joke." Well, of course it was! AND I get to pony up $116 for the privilege, too!
Granted, the trip is an educational one, and one that I'd like to go on, if given the chance. (They're going to see the King Tut exhibit and the Terracotta Army in Atlanta.) I can't go however, because of this pesky thing called work, and because we will be leaving not even 24 hours later on a Girl Scout trip to go snow-skiing. Don't worry, I'm not taking the ankle biters -- this trip is Offspring's troop. We'll be driving to West Virginia, so I will need plenty of rest beforehand. Which means no back-to-back trips for good old Mom. Poor old Dad won't be going on EITHER trip. He'd have to bunk with a bunch of Boy Scouts he doesn't know for the skiing trip, and he's not exactly what one would call a social animal.
So, I'm off to bed in hopes that my voice will return as mysteriously as it left. If not, I have another day of pointing and gesturing ahead. What fun!
Friday, March 06, 2009
Woman On Fire
I know posting has been down to an all-time low here lately, and for that I'm sorry. I just don't how many ways I can say "I'm not dead yet, but I'm fresh out of blog fodder" without making your heads explode. I know *I'm* getting tired of hearing that, and it's my blog!
School has been a bug-bear. I seem to have the royal knack for pissing people off lately. There's a lot of pressure on teachers these days -- it seems like if we sneeze, we piss a parent or three off. I have a child who is a Jehovah's Witness, and while we don't want to offend the family, we DO still have to teach the child about holidays and the like. If for no other reason because we teach calendar skills, and if we ask what the holiday in March is, the answer would be St. Patrick's Day. That is not a deliberate slight to people who don't celebrate St. Patrick's Day, but we can't NOT teach that because one family doesn't approve. You know what I mean?
My new Girl Scout troop is going well -- there are 17 of them! I was worried that I wouldn't have enough to make up a troop (which is five) and here I am with one of the largest troops in our area! I'm liking it. Most of them seem very excited to be there, and they seem to be happy with all of the things we've done so far. I've got some not-so-attentive parents, but I chalk a lot of that up to the fact that I don't see them every meeting.
Juggling Freak's birthday is next week. I was torn with what to get him this year, and seriously considered a unicycle. He, understandably, wants to TRY OUT a unicycle first to make sure he doesn't kill himself on it. This sounds awfully cautious of him. This is also the man who wants to flamethrower our big oak tree in the backyard because it sheds bushels of leaves no matter WHAT season it happens to be. This is also the man who got on a wild hair at a woodpecker who was pecking our house, and would have killed it, had we actual firearms in the house and not just a black powder replica. Now, I freely admit that by the end of that particular situation, I would have gleefully killed that woodpecker myself for pecking my bedroom eaves at seven in the damn morning every Saturday. Instead, we tried all the things the avian vets recommended: nasty-tasting sprays, decoy birds, changing the wood out. None of that worked. JF finally paintball-gunned it away. I hope he didn't kill the bird, but I also hope he's too scared to ever come back.
Offspring is tempermental. It's the age. Half the time, she pretends we're not there, and when she's forced to actually --UGH -- *interact* with us, she does a lot of eye-rolling and grunting. Then when she wants something, I hear "Mommy...." She hasn't called me Mommy since she was about seven. Not unless she's angling for something. We've actually all been sick, and she's been more lovey since being sick. I think we all sort of revert to childhood when we feel unwell, and she's holding true to that.
Speaking of sick, we've all been passing around a virus of some sort within our family. I have spent most of this week with sinus congestion of massive proportions, so much so that I had supressed hearing in one ear due to cloggage on Wednesday. My throat has been so raw that I have honestly LOOKED FORWARD to taking NyQuil just for the numbing effect. I took Mucinex, which tastes like bug spray, just to get some relief. This illness, whatever it is, has kicked our collective asses in a MAJOR way this week. My throat is no longer on fire, but JF has been stumbling around with fevers of 102 and 103. Not good in adults. I'm surprised he's been able to function. I know I got all muzzy-headed, and I wasn't battling fever, just congestion.
So, that's all I got. Not much. Still alive, though not really feeling like "alive" fits after this week. Just surviving.
School has been a bug-bear. I seem to have the royal knack for pissing people off lately. There's a lot of pressure on teachers these days -- it seems like if we sneeze, we piss a parent or three off. I have a child who is a Jehovah's Witness, and while we don't want to offend the family, we DO still have to teach the child about holidays and the like. If for no other reason because we teach calendar skills, and if we ask what the holiday in March is, the answer would be St. Patrick's Day. That is not a deliberate slight to people who don't celebrate St. Patrick's Day, but we can't NOT teach that because one family doesn't approve. You know what I mean?
My new Girl Scout troop is going well -- there are 17 of them! I was worried that I wouldn't have enough to make up a troop (which is five) and here I am with one of the largest troops in our area! I'm liking it. Most of them seem very excited to be there, and they seem to be happy with all of the things we've done so far. I've got some not-so-attentive parents, but I chalk a lot of that up to the fact that I don't see them every meeting.
Juggling Freak's birthday is next week. I was torn with what to get him this year, and seriously considered a unicycle. He, understandably, wants to TRY OUT a unicycle first to make sure he doesn't kill himself on it. This sounds awfully cautious of him. This is also the man who wants to flamethrower our big oak tree in the backyard because it sheds bushels of leaves no matter WHAT season it happens to be. This is also the man who got on a wild hair at a woodpecker who was pecking our house, and would have killed it, had we actual firearms in the house and not just a black powder replica. Now, I freely admit that by the end of that particular situation, I would have gleefully killed that woodpecker myself for pecking my bedroom eaves at seven in the damn morning every Saturday. Instead, we tried all the things the avian vets recommended: nasty-tasting sprays, decoy birds, changing the wood out. None of that worked. JF finally paintball-gunned it away. I hope he didn't kill the bird, but I also hope he's too scared to ever come back.
Offspring is tempermental. It's the age. Half the time, she pretends we're not there, and when she's forced to actually --UGH -- *interact* with us, she does a lot of eye-rolling and grunting. Then when she wants something, I hear "Mommy...." She hasn't called me Mommy since she was about seven. Not unless she's angling for something. We've actually all been sick, and she's been more lovey since being sick. I think we all sort of revert to childhood when we feel unwell, and she's holding true to that.
Speaking of sick, we've all been passing around a virus of some sort within our family. I have spent most of this week with sinus congestion of massive proportions, so much so that I had supressed hearing in one ear due to cloggage on Wednesday. My throat has been so raw that I have honestly LOOKED FORWARD to taking NyQuil just for the numbing effect. I took Mucinex, which tastes like bug spray, just to get some relief. This illness, whatever it is, has kicked our collective asses in a MAJOR way this week. My throat is no longer on fire, but JF has been stumbling around with fevers of 102 and 103. Not good in adults. I'm surprised he's been able to function. I know I got all muzzy-headed, and I wasn't battling fever, just congestion.
So, that's all I got. Not much. Still alive, though not really feeling like "alive" fits after this week. Just surviving.
Tuesday, March 03, 2009
So Freakin' Junior High
I am currently embroiled in an Unbloggable, but I will let slip my guard enough to say that grown ladies who are supposed to be of strong moral character and hardy constitutions are being very childish right now.
As one of my friends commented: "I think it's time we all put on our big girl panties and dealt with this."
I thought I was long past the histrionics and teeth-gnashing of junior high. I'm sorry to hear that I was misinformed.
As one of my friends commented: "I think it's time we all put on our big girl panties and dealt with this."
I thought I was long past the histrionics and teeth-gnashing of junior high. I'm sorry to hear that I was misinformed.
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Random Bullets of The Same-Old, Same-Old
There's nothing really exciting going on here in Casa KLee, which is why there have been so few posts lately. And, rather than reiterate that with yet ANOTHER post that tells you, yes -- I am alive, but am a boring sod, I give you Random Bullets!
* Offspring narrowly missed summary execution by bring home a truly horrendous mid-term report. After tears (on her part) and exhortations to get crackin' on that grade (my part), bloodshed was averted. But just barely. When your honor students brings home a 43% average, that's officially NOT GOOD. And, yes -- there was cussing involved. (Her father and I.)
* I am so freaking tired of Girl Scout cookies, you all just don't know. Many, many thanks to Kathy A. for relieving me -- and the hatchback of my car -- of ten boxes.
* I am headed to Baltimore in a little more than 2 weeks for a professional conference. Binsk, if you're out there, you up for lunch? I'd love to do the Mikey Kellerman Memorial Pub Crawl, but I'm a serious lightweight, and I have to get up and you know, FUNCTION, the next day.
* Said trip to Baltimore will happen on the overnight train, which I have never done before. I hope the train is comfortable for fat people who need sleep desperately.
* JF has been very sick this week, including staying home from work on both Friday and Monday. That NEVER happens. He has to be bleeding from the eyeballs before he admits to being sick, but poor baby's been doped up liberally with DayQuil, NyQuil, and they made another kind of -Quil, he'd be on that, too. He went back to work today, but dragged in this afternoon like the Living Dead. I hope he feels better soon!
* My mother and stepfather have a Westie named Doc. They love this dog to distraction, and I swear he couldn't be more spoiled if he were human. Now, I'm not a dog person AT ALL, but Doc has personality. I like him. Well, my Mom caved in, and they bought a female Westie not too long ago as a companion. Her name is Skye, and she's a cutie. They dropped by our house this weekend to show her off a bit. She's still a puppy, but Mom says she's already ruling the roost. Doc's a good boy to put up with all her mess. I'll have to get pics soon.
* School is going well, but there are always the few that lag behind no matter how much effort you put forth for them. I have one child who is in a very sad situation, not only in his school life, but in his family life as well. I have prayed for guidance on this one, but I think , sadly, I forsee a future falling through the cracks. We'll work our hardest to make sure that doesn't happen, but when the parents just don't care, there's not much you can do.
* The Girl Scout troop is going well, though I have a few very headstrong little girls. I am trying my utmost to mold that headstrong streak in a positive way. I'll let you know how that all works out.
That's really all that's happening in this part of the world. Sorry it isn't more entertaining.
* Offspring narrowly missed summary execution by bring home a truly horrendous mid-term report. After tears (on her part) and exhortations to get crackin' on that grade (my part), bloodshed was averted. But just barely. When your honor students brings home a 43% average, that's officially NOT GOOD. And, yes -- there was cussing involved. (Her father and I.)
* I am so freaking tired of Girl Scout cookies, you all just don't know. Many, many thanks to Kathy A. for relieving me -- and the hatchback of my car -- of ten boxes.
* I am headed to Baltimore in a little more than 2 weeks for a professional conference. Binsk, if you're out there, you up for lunch? I'd love to do the Mikey Kellerman Memorial Pub Crawl, but I'm a serious lightweight, and I have to get up and you know, FUNCTION, the next day.
* Said trip to Baltimore will happen on the overnight train, which I have never done before. I hope the train is comfortable for fat people who need sleep desperately.
* JF has been very sick this week, including staying home from work on both Friday and Monday. That NEVER happens. He has to be bleeding from the eyeballs before he admits to being sick, but poor baby's been doped up liberally with DayQuil, NyQuil, and they made another kind of -Quil, he'd be on that, too. He went back to work today, but dragged in this afternoon like the Living Dead. I hope he feels better soon!
* My mother and stepfather have a Westie named Doc. They love this dog to distraction, and I swear he couldn't be more spoiled if he were human. Now, I'm not a dog person AT ALL, but Doc has personality. I like him. Well, my Mom caved in, and they bought a female Westie not too long ago as a companion. Her name is Skye, and she's a cutie. They dropped by our house this weekend to show her off a bit. She's still a puppy, but Mom says she's already ruling the roost. Doc's a good boy to put up with all her mess. I'll have to get pics soon.
* School is going well, but there are always the few that lag behind no matter how much effort you put forth for them. I have one child who is in a very sad situation, not only in his school life, but in his family life as well. I have prayed for guidance on this one, but I think , sadly, I forsee a future falling through the cracks. We'll work our hardest to make sure that doesn't happen, but when the parents just don't care, there's not much you can do.
* The Girl Scout troop is going well, though I have a few very headstrong little girls. I am trying my utmost to mold that headstrong streak in a positive way. I'll let you know how that all works out.
That's really all that's happening in this part of the world. Sorry it isn't more entertaining.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Nothing New to Report
I'm here, but have nothing of great import to tell you all about. I got off work early today to go to the local Girl Scout store to get some needed items for my troop meeting on Thursday, and then I went to Sam's Club, where I got some chicken sausage with mozzerella and roasted garlic for supper.
What a life, right?
I know. Try and stop yourselves from swooning from the glamor of it all.
What a life, right?
I know. Try and stop yourselves from swooning from the glamor of it all.
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