Wandering through cyberspace, I spent some time last night over at Not Without My Handbag's Bad Baby Names section. When I was done snorting up my lungs through my nose in utter hilarity (and utter shock) at what people choose to saddle their poor children with, name-wise, I began to ponder...
I've worked with children for about 10-12 years now, in one capacity or another. Here are some of the more interesting names that I've run across:
Wachovia -- these people named their child after a bank. What's next, Home Equity Loan, and her brother, Interest Due?
Lamarseillaise -- apparently, these parents saw the title of the French National Anthem, and though -- hm. That's make a good name for our son. Never mind that he'll never be able to fit it on any of his schoolwork! We'll just call him Lamar!
Sharmontez -- This child was teased unmercifully because of her name. It took her forever to learn how to spell it. Most people never did pronounce it right.
Pink -- This, sadly, was the name of a boy. And, also very sadly, because I live in the South, it almost always got pronounced "Pank." I'm not sure which incarnation is worse.
A trio of sisters named: Precious, Princess, and Heavenly Joy. I'm all for people finding names that mean a lot to them, but this was smarmy to the point of requiring antibiotics. Or, at least a hefty dose of insulin. And, following form, those kids were about the meanest little girls I've ever seen.
Quantonesha, and her big brother Quantavious -- nice kids. But, those poor, poor kids.
Then there was the kid that had about fifteen names : Michael John-Robert Alexander something something. After Alexander, I ran out of breath and had to regroup, so I never did learn his other two names. And, the *weird* thing about this poor child was that his parents wanted you to call him by ALL of the names! I told them "By the time I finish calling him, I forgot what I wanted him for!" They had run across so many baby names that they really liked that they finally chose them all.
Shamarlia -- I was just sorta wondering if they were trying to name this girl "Shalimar", but couldn't remember how to spell it....
There have been countless others, but if I reveal too many at one time, you'll all think I'm just doing it for comic effect. I won't hit you with the full load of them now....I'll just save them up to pop them into conversation to liven things up. We'll be chatting along, and suddenly, I'll just let fly with "Shawndreia AnJanae!" And you'll all bust a gut with mirth. :)
What are some of the more...um.....unique names you all have seen?
7 hours ago